An Oath Is Still An Oath....

Much as it goes against the grain to pander too much to one person's opinion in my blog, (other than my own of course), I felt I should voice my opinions on a specific issue following my friend Shaun's pasting of this link in answer to my earlier post:

The Soldier Who Didn't Want to Fight...

Joe Glenton, according to the article seems to think that having made an oath to fight for Queen and Country, he then gets to pick and choose which conflicts that oath applies to. Instead of fulfilling his duty as agreed, under no duress upon commencing his role as a soldier, he thinks it's ok to wave his own personal flag and take him self off on a little holiday instead.

Here is the news. This man is not a brave figure standing up for the rights of the common man. He is a man who has chosen to let down his friends, his regiment and his nation by going back on his word.

An oath is still the same now as it was a thousand years ago. The meaning of the word has not changed, nor has the spirit in which it is intended when one swears it. You do not give up you right to free thought and individuality when you join the forces. However you do give up the right to decide on which conflicts you will take part in. That is the basic cornerstone of a volunteer military system. There can be absolutely no trust in a military force to defend it's nation if the individuals within that force cannot be trusted to act as one as they have all agreed to do upon signing up.

Joe Glenton has the right to complain. It is a soldiers right to do so as the old saying goes. He does not have the right to waste thousands of pounds of tax-payers money in training him, only to decide unilaterally that any particular conflict does not suit him or his politics.

Far from being a brave individual as my friend Shaun describes him, Joe Glenton is a deserter. Nothing more and nothing less.

Recognising The Cost Of Bravery...

Unlike our American cousins during the Vietnam war, we, the British public have always been decent enough (in the main) to recognise that, whilst we at home may not always support the principles of a conflict in which our servicemen and women are embroiled, we do not have the callousness to take that fact out on the servicemen themselves.

Whatever your political stance on Iraq, Afghanistan or even the Falklands war, we have generally accepted that those who have done their duty and served their country do so regardless of personal opinion, because we understand that someone has to be prepared to fight, be wounded and sometimes die for their country without having the option to make a specific political decision about the conflict as an individual. That is why we have the best troops in the world.

A combination of discipline and courage.

So it is particularly galling to see the MOD still conducting a court case in an attempt to reduce the compensation for two soldiers injured doing the essential job that most of us simply would not have the stomach to do.

Those responsible for continuing this insult to the bravery of every member of the British Forces should be thoroughly ashamed, as should we for allowing such a a circumstance to arise.

The Power of Prayer To Kill...

It will come as no big surprise to regular readers to hear my opinion of Dale Neumann, a Wisconsin man who stood around with his other God-bothering friends praying for his 11 year old daughter to be healed while she slowly died of diabetes.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/8180116.stm

This moron has thankfully been convicted of second degree reckless homicide, as was his wife last year on the same charge. They will both be sentenced in October and could face up to 25 years.

I think it would be a more appropriate sentence to re-introduce a trial by ordeal under such circumstances. Surely Neumann would have no objections to testing God's powers against his own life rather than that of a child? Perhaps a stake-burning? Thrown into a sack with snakes? Something along those lines?

Just think of the money it would save compared to 25 years of feeding this worthless waste of space.

Referee - 1 Thug - 0......

Glad to see an 18 month sentence given to bullying fuckwit thug Richard Norman 33, (see lumpy individual to the right).

As reported by the BBC at: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/south_west/8132018.stm
Norman followed the 62 year old ref of his son's under 14's football match and punched the official leaving him requiring ten stitches.

What a lovely example to set one's child in how to respect authority figures. It's a shame this moron will only be out of his son's life for 18 months, the poor little sod might have had some hope of growing up into a normal stable human being if Daddy was to disappear from the scene altogether. Sadly a clear indictment of one of my favourite old lines, you need a license to keep a dog, but they let any bloody fool have children.

For England Harry And St George...

I think I've just had the most quintessentially English moment it's possible to have, which I would heartily recommend to any of my fine fellow Englishmen, or indeed to any of you Johnny Foreigners out there who would like, if only for the most fleeting of moments, to experience what a joy it is to be English.

Take one bottle of fine English Ale, Old Peculiar, London Pride, Old Speckled Hen, Newcastle Brown, there are many fine examples to choose from, find yourself a comfy chair, envelop yourself in your headphones, select Elgar's Nimrod and then press play with the volume suitably high.

Close your eyes and your mind will be awash with visions of Spitfires flying over white cliffs, cricket matches on village greens, thatched cottages surrounded by a profusion of brightly coloured flowers, Yorkshire puddings, cups of tea and cucumber sandwiches.

Go on, try it, after all, inside every foreigner is an Englishman trying to get out!

Till Death Us Do Part.....

I was deeply moved by the story today of Sir Edward Thomas Downes 85 and his terminally ill wife Joan 74, who chose to end their lives together at a clinic in Switzerland.

Mr Downes himself was almost blind and partially deaf as well as having other health problems. He was one of this countries foremost conductors, having worked with the BBC Philharmonic for forty years, whilst his wife Joan was a former ballet dancer and successful choreographer.

This is one of the most romantic stories I have ever seen in the news. Two people have been able to bring their wonderfully fulfilled lives to an end together, rather than continue in pain and suffering with the certainty of one or the other having to be left to face the world alone at some point for the first time in fifty-four years.

Anyone who sees this as anything other than an acceptable decision for adults to make is not only misguided but cruel. How long before the criminalization of this procedure in this country is thrown out for the archaic thoughtless interference it really is.

Boris Drops A Bollock...

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, Mayor Boris has dropped an awfully big bollock this time, just as I was beginning to think he might be one of the few politicians worth anything in this age of our country being governed by cynical money grabbing charlatans.

In an interview with Stephen Sakur for Hardtalk.....

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8149313.stm

dear old blundering Boris refers to his £250,000 annual pay packet for knocking out a weekly article for the Sunday Torygraph as 'chicken-feed'!

I actually don't have a problem with Boris earning a quarter of a million quid for writing some silly series of articles, (if I could get paid for doing so, I'd be in heaven!), but calling that amount of money 'chicken-feed' when the vast majority of the population of this country are feeling the bite of a recession has to be one of the most serious pieces of ill-judgement since King Charles turned to his wife and said, 'Don't worry darling, nobody would dare touch me, God gave me this job...'

As the interview continues Boris does a fine job of trying to scramble out of the bottomless pit he has dug himself with his silly remark by dredging deep in the 'I give money to charity' trough, the oft used straw grasped at by the over-paid. I hope I have mixed enough metaphors there to keep critics busy for a while, but I would like to point out, it's not like I'm being paid £250,000 to write this nonsense....

The Buccaneer Explorer....

I've just started reading a couple of excellent books that followed on, unsurprisingly, from another book I'd been reading: History of Australia and New Zealand by Alexander Sutherland. Written in the 1890's, in the book's early pages it makes some references to a man by the name of William Dampier.

Originally from Somerset, Dampier spent the best part of his life as a privateer, buccaneer or pirate, managed to circumnavigate the world three times and in between was very productive as a writer, authoring the first major English travel book: A New Voyage Around The World along with a host of other books about his lifelong travels.

The Buccaneer Explorer, William Dampier's Voyages Edited by Gerald Norris is an awesome compilation of some of Dampier's writings, and I've also just started reading A Pirate Of Exquisite Mind by Diana & Michael Preston a biography of the man himself, based on what I've read so far, William is turning out to be a great English hero apparently forgotten by many.

Murray, Bunny, And Other Tennis Balls...

So, Andy Murray is out of the Wimbledon tournament.

Well, are we really surprised? Isn't it a given that no Brit can ever get to the final, let alone win it?

Not since 1938 with Henry 'Bunny' Austin has a son of this soil got to play in the final.

One of the cool things about a sport that involves individuals rather than teams is that you get the opportunity to go beyond the simple tribal requirements of following your national representatives and delve into the personalities of the players involved.

Through our all seeing TV eyes we get to decide who's a miserable sod, who has a fun personality, who loves his mum, who's got a bit of a temper, all with no actual basis in fact of course, other than seeing a person for a few hours out of their whole lives in an entirely false situation.

But that's ok, even back in ancient Rome, the audience didn't really give a toss about the person in the arena doing battle for their entertainment, they perhaps just felt a brief moment of kinship, based on some random fact, the warrior's homeland, or name perhaps, now, as then, you pick your champion, based on whatever unimportant criteria you have selected, then cheer for him ever louder as he defeats opponent after opponent, until inevitably he is defeated himself.

Now our champion is slain. Do we mourn his loss? Do we let our anger towards his slayer ferment into enmity at his next combat?

Actually no. Andy Roddick seemed like a much nicer bloke in his sound-bites anyway.

Besides, it's not like Murray was English.

Feeding The Latest Addiction...

Don't tell the wife.... but I bought three more books today, just days after getting a Sony Reader for my birthday, and immediately loading up on 11'000, yes, 11'000 ebooks to fill my little mind to my hearts content.

In my defence, I bought them from a charity shop, so expense was low, but I can't seem to stop buying more books than I can possibly get round to reading (even though I read VERY quickly).

I can only assume that this is just another demonstration of my addictive personality (as if more evidence were required), but I hope that, in the long term at least, this one might prove to be non-health threatening, and might even carry some fringe benefits.. Though people are already commenting on the lack of social interaction with me as I bury my nose in a book regardless of company etc.

For the record, the books are:
The Great Escape by Paul Brickhill
A History of The British Secret Service by Richard Deacon
& War Behind Enemy Lines by Julian Thompson
Yes, there's a bit of a theme, I've always loved a bit of WWII history and it's been a while since I read any so I thought I'd indulge myself. By the way I got them all from the Sam Beare Hospice Bookshop in Weybridge which is not just an excellent cause but also an excellent bookshop. I know that's a bit 'local' for this worldwide, border straddling, internet thing, but I do actually know some people who live within a few miles of me who might be interested!

A Fence Sitter By Any Other Name...

A small point but one I think worth voicing, I absolutely bloody detest the phrase "African American", it is a typical mealy-mouthed pathetic piece of politically correct new-speak we have been force fed for a number of years now. It is equally as annoying as "Irish-American" (There are more who choose that particular namby-pamby fence-sitting moniker than actual Irish people for crying out loud!).

With the recent death of Michael Not-Very-Blackson, I've heard interviewers asking the standard trite question "What did his work mean to African Americans?"

It meant bugger all, because there is no such thing. If you are American and proud of it, say so, it does not need to be qualified or justified based on the trials and tribulations of your distant ancestors, it's about YOU. Everyone has the right to proud of their nation, and if you're not, then by all means deny it and call yourself African, or Irish, or what ever you'd rather be associated with, but get off the bloody fence and pick a team.

Walton on Thames to Melbourne...Continued..

Every new day that dawns (the one's when I'm not thinking about the fact I'm not smoking anymore at least), a few moments creep into my consciousness when I can't help getting very upset and emotional about the people I'm going to be leaving behind.

In spite of the 'small' world we now live in, the wonders(?) of the Internet, Facebook, email, skype etc, I know the way it really works, even if most people don't want to admit it.... There are some people I love dearly that I may never see face to face for a very very long time, sometimes ever again.

It's a really harsh reality that one has to face up to with a journey like this coming up. We all hear the old lines about friends that one doesn't see for years and then when you do, it just carries on where you left off, but let's be honest, life is not really like that in most cases, and why would you want it to be?

One of the things I cherish about the people I see almost every day, the people I love, the important people, is watching them grow, feeling our relationship grow, our understanding of one another deepen over time, our respect and acceptance of one another as individuals become more solid. You just don't get that with a relationship in which you never spend time together for long periods. It's sad, but it's reality.

I will miss my dear friends more deeply than I can conceive of at this moment. This is only made bearable by the fact that my dearest friend in the world will be with me every step of the way, living the big adventure with me, making it worth the sacrifices we both have to make.

There are times when this amazing thing we are about to do is not as simple as one might imagine.

Mad Dogs & Englishmen...

Does anyone know where I can come by a Pith-Helmet?

The only way I can keep some semblance of sanity in this ridiculously un-English heatwave we're having is to imagine myself sitting atop a great horse, resplendent in red tunic, Henri-Martini tucked under my arm, surveying some desolate sun-baked hell-hole we have recently conquered, (having first sent in the Scots to terrify the natives of course).

They are the only circumstances in which an Englishman should have to tolerate such distinctly colonial weather.

Anyone wishing to join me for tiffin on the veranda later please RSVP to my char-wallah.

Has Anyone Ever Seen Them Together?....

So Latoya Jackson has finally arrived at the Jackson mansion (you know the one an apparent bankrupt can rent for $100,000 dollars a month), so, still no-one has ever seen them both together, has Michael finally severed all relations with his male persona, destined to live out his life as the female side of his personality (ie Latoya) to avoid paying off the bankruptcy payments. One things for sure, with all his mediocre tunes rocketing back to the top of the charts (in the face of today's lack-lustre pop opposition, is that really a surprise) at least all the debts should now get paid off.

Rumours the the Reverend Jesse Jackson is neither confirming nor denying that they are related are lending credence to the story that the God-bothering political activist has no idea what to do with himself now that there's a black president.

Anyone For Tennis?... Apparently Not...

As many people will be aware, I'm not exactly the worlds biggest sports fan.

I 'support' West Ham in the sense that as an English male, one has to 'support' someone or be considered a social retard, but much to the amusement of my friends that are 'real' football fans, I haven't known the names of any of the team for about fifteen years.

With this level of sporting interest in mind, I got up today and thought I might make a brief foray into the sporting world, and watch a bit of tennis, Wimbledon is on after all, and even if the actual sport bit gets boring, there's very little down side to watching occasionally cute women dancing about in little white skirts is there?

Only there's none on. None at all. Not a ball to be found. I now gather that I'm a victim of the English weather here, because my recollections of there always being a bit of Wimbledon to watch on the middle Sunday, may well spring entirely from the fact that normally they're trying to catch up after a week of dodging the rain. So it looks like I'm not destined to make that foray into sport after all.

Is that Fred Perry chap still quite good?

Walton on Thames to Melbourne: A Journey...

As some of you will know it's now only four months until my wife and I up sticks and move from Leafy Surrey in the UK to Melbourne Australia.

This impending journey is part of my reason for starting to write this blog again, I've found I'm a bit crap at keeping in touch with people on Facebook, simply put, I don't really have much to contribute in the 'normal' daily run of things.

I think I'm apparently quite good however, at writing a running stream of conciousness in the form of a blog. I am, after all, well known for my ability to rant, and what's a blog if it's not an online rant eh?

So, there will be, at no particular rate of interval, my thoughts on the great trauma on moving to the other side of the world, liberally accompanied by my less than interesting comment on life the universe and everything.

For those who don't know, I'm also currently trying to write a novel, the culmination of years of telling people I had the ability to write without ever having to prove it. Well now I'm putting my money (or at least my time) where my mouth is. I'm a fair way into it and yes, I do hope to get it published one day, even though I'm well aware there are about a billion authors out there these days. One of the disadvantages of mass education is that every person who can read also thinks they can write, and yes, I count myself among that number, but who knows, I might get lucky.

Todays "Things About Moving To Another Continent You Never Knew"
For 43 years I have, like everyone else amassed a huge amount of pointless possessions that serve no purpose, and I'm about to spend a large part of the next four months trying to get rid of the bloody things, so if you have at any point wandered about my home and thought to yourself "Ooooh, I would'nt mind that"... Please ask now, don't be shy, that item could now be yours, for the once in a lifetime price of "Nothing At All".... No really, I have to throw all this shit away otherwise!!

William Bligh, Not Likely To Get Lost Winner 1789

As usual Hollywood has done a great disservice to an Historical figure in the person of William Bligh, RN, Commander of Her Majesty's Armed Vessel Bounty.

I've just read his memoirs, "A Voyage To The South Sea" in which he relates the story of how he manages to get 18 of his comrades across 3618 miles of the Pacific Ocean, with very little rations and no weapons in a boat about twenty five feet long, for 41 days, while the mutinous Fletcher Christian and his chums park their collective backsides on Pitcairn having decided a life of shagging natives and eating coconuts is preferable to getting home to good old Blighty.

Now I'm as lazy as the next man, but I hardly think this demonstation of the idleness of the average Englishman in the 18th century is justification for poor old Bligh, arguably one of the greatest navigators England has ever known based on his exploits, to become the villain in at least three Hollywood adaptations of the Bounty mutiny.

Though Mel Gibson is on one of them, so you were always on a safe bet that somewhere in the story an Englishman was being misrepresented I guess.

History: My Part In It's Downfall

As I've spent the last few years gradually becoming a History geek, I've decided I might occasionally share my thoughts on any given Historical subject I'm reading up on, here, for the general enjoyment of anyone bored enough to be reading my blog. If you find it interesting, good-oh, if you don't, I guess you'll find something else to read!!

Michael Jackson...Death & Disinterest...

As a great lump of the (let's be honest) less imaginative portion of the Western world mourn the passing of pop music's biggest waste of space, let's please spare a moment's thought for those among us who have no interest either in his music, or the revelations about his not so private life over the last couple of decades.

I don't care if "Thriller" is considered a turning point for pop music, I was a Mod when it came out so I'm hardly likely to have even listened to it am I?

I don't care if he had plastic surgery or not, he went from an average looking black guy to a weird looking white guy, hardly a resounding success for the "Nip & Tuck" fraternity I would have said.

I don't care if he crossed the line in his levels of intimacy with the children of freaky families dumb enough to let their off-spring stay over in the house of a confirmed bachelor with lots of money and playground rides in his back garden. They weren't related to me after all.

All I know is that poor old Farrah Fawcett had a large part of her life overshadowed by a $6 million dollar man made of bionics, then she had her death overshadowed by a $6 billion dollar bankrupt made of plastics. Gutted for her.

Long Time No Speak

There's been no real acceptable reason for my absence other than a complete lack of inspiration, even when MP's are screwing us in every direction and I'm on the verge of making the biggest move of my life, ie moving to Melbourne, but there you go, it's not like I'm going to apologise, accept it and read on... or not... the choice, as they say, is yours....

The Urge Returns...

After yet another marathon absence from my horrendously neglected blog, I thought I’d put some of my less than important recent thoughts out for public consumption again, and, just to indicate how fickle I can be in these things, I’ll kick off with a pretty much directly opposing opinion to one I expressed some time back…

Thank You Boris II…

Back in October 2006 I had a little pop at the then Tory education spokesman Boris “pies through the railings” Johnson. Well clearly my condemnation at the time was just what he needed to get voted in as Mayor of London (though being up against Red Ken probably helped a bit too).

At the time of his election I have to admit to getting that shiver down my spine that any sane person gets when a Tory manages to get his or her mucky paws on a position of authority. But, I have to admit, he’s grown on me. Though of admittedly little importance as part of the job in hand, the first thing that began to endear me to Boris was realising that his habit of looking like he always dressed in the dark, was not an affectation to curry favour with any scarecrows that may have voting rights in London. He really doesn’t give a toss how he looks. A rare thing indeed, in spite of the number of people who constantly claim not to care what other people think of the way they look.

His outspoken attitude (obviously a trait I personally empathize with) gradually saw him creep up in my estimations. Then recently, we hear he is actually going to get rid of London’s congestion charge extension. Another one in the back of the net for Boris.

However he’s managed to really get me on-side recently with the Mayoral equivalent of scoring a hat-trick against Germany in a world cup final. He’s kicked that obnoxious public enemy, Ian Blair, out of his job with the Metropolitan Police.

Boris, if you do nothing else in your term, you have done every Londoner a great service by giving him a nudge out of the door. If only you could find some way to stop him taking his outrageous severance package. You could buy yourself an extra couple of venues for the Olympics.

Blame Free Road Use....

Text driver jailed for bike death

A motorist who was texting on her mobile phone when she hit and killed a cyclist has been sentenced to four years in prison.

Jordan Wickington, 19, died from head injuries when he went through a red light and was struck by Kiera Coultas's car in Southampton in February 2007.

Full Story: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/hampshire/7270751.stm

Am I the only one who is outraged that nobody seems to give a damn Wickington was going through a red light at the time of the accident? Whatever the driver did wrong, he died because he went through a red light.

She was guilty of appalling bad driving, and should be punished for it, but isn’t she just being used as a scapegoat here, when the person who died was guilty of equally appalling behaviour?

What kind of signal does this send to the growing number of cyclists out there who seem to have the impression that they can do whatever they like on the roads, are not subject to the rules everyone else has to follow, and are always the ‘victim’ in any accident?

Cyclists are the only road users who are not subject to any form of testing, age restrictions licensing procedures or road tax. Yet more and more roads are being made potentially more dangerous for other road users as they are effectively narrowed to accommodate cycle lanes.

Isn’t it time cyclists stopped getting a free ride?

Giving Up The Holy Ghost....

Archbishop sparks Sharia law row

Leading politicians have distanced themselves from the Archbishop of Canterbury's belief that some Sharia law in the UK seems "unavoidable".

Full Story: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/7233335.stm

Well, to coin a phrase, Oh My God!

Just what is going on in the head of this woolly minded God botherer?? Obviously the impotent wishy-washy institution that is the Church of England has finally given up the (holy) ghost. Not content with failing to convince ever greater numbers to buy into their groundless belief system, they are now apparently resigned to the fact that another equally spurious one should have legal sway over British people.

I would have at least some respect for the Church of England if it had enough backbone to publicly reinforce its core doctrine that Christianity is the ONLY true faith. At least Islam is not shy about standing by that one, no matter how distasteful it may be to non-believers.

Still, let’s look on the positive side; at least one of the remnants of pre-thinking society is putting itself out of business. Giving the rest of us the ability to focus on the others.

And So The Deed Is Done...

Yesterday saw the culmination of many months of work, (very much on Naomi's part) as we celebrated our wedding, surrounded by the most amazing friends any couple could possibly hope for.

It truly was one of the most amazing days of my life.

Thank you all so very much, Naomi and I love you all, the only down side to going away together for a wonderful month, will be not being with you all for that time.

We would like to thank you all from the bottom of our hearts, we feel extremely honoured to know every one of you.

Thank you.

Justice Saudi Style....

Saudi gang-rape victim is jailed
By Frances Harrison
BBC News

An appeal court in Saudi Arabia has doubled the number of lashes and added a jail sentence as punishment for a woman who was gang-raped.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/7096814.stm For full story......

Just how long will the UK and other western nations continue to treat Saudi Arabia as an equal, pander to its whims and ‘idiosyncrasies’ and keep their collective heads in the sand just to protect the oil industry?

Saudi Arabia is a barbaric society that allows acts of evil to be continually perpetrated in the name of its sickeningly inhumane legal system. It perpetuates brutality and intolerance, is violently misogynistic, and is one of the most barren nations on this earth when it comes to justice.

Distressing stories such as the one above rarely get the response, from our government that they deserve. I’m thinking we may be stationing troops in the wrong country in that part of the world at the moment.

If any nation was deserving of the violent imposition of ‘democracy’ that seems to have become our current favoured methodology, Saudi Arabia must be top of the list.

Death And Dishonour.......

Police censured over Menezes case
London's Metropolitan Police made serious and avoidable errors in killing an innocent man, a watchdog says.
An Independent Police Complaints Commission (IPCC) report highlights what it says were failures in procedures and communication.

And it says Commissioner Sir Ian Blair tried to prevent its investigation.
Sir Ian has again rejected calls for his resignation.

Full story: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7084829.stm

So the only man in the country in a position to take responsibility for this execution style killing, will not only face no sanction for this atrocity, he doesn't even have the decency to resign from his job.

Top that off with the weasel like politicians who are actually defending his position and you get a picture of the sort of arrogant, selfish, thoughtless individuals who have positions of power over the people of this country and will do anything to hang on to them. Gone are the days of anyone resigning honourably when they have failed in their duty it seems.

Isn’t it ironic that Ian Blair has the title ‘Sir’?

A title meant to embody a spirit of honour and chivalry, attached to a name that will forever be associated by many, with a man who is no longer deserving of credibility or respect.

How proud officers in the Metropolitan police must be to serve under such a noble leader.

And how comfortably must the population of London now sleep at nights to have this man responsible for their safety.

Suffer The Little Children....

The right to die for Jehovah

By Clare Murphy

Health reporter, BBC News

A young Jehovah's Witness has died just hours after giving birth to twins. She had signed a form refusing blood transfusions, and her family would not overrule her. Couldn't doctors have intervened?

Full Story: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/7078673.stm

Once again the selfish nature of religious belief becomes apparent, as these two young babies are subjected to a life without a mother because of her selfish and misplaced loyalties to a blind and baseless doctrine.

According to reports, the children’s father, Anthony Gough is now looking after them. I hope he has sense enough to now realise the selfishness of these beliefs, and not compound these children’s harm at the loss of a mother, by then indoctrinating them in the same worthless faith that has led to this situation.

Blame Free Bloating....

Obesity 'not individuals' fault'

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/7047244.stm

Individuals can no longer be held responsible for obesity and government must act to stop Britain "sleepwalking" into a crisis, a report has concluded.

The largest ever UK study into obesity, backed by government and compiled by 250 experts, said excess weight was now the norm in our "obesogenic" society.

So yet another level of personal responsibility is eaten away. If you stuff too many buns into your pie-hole, blame someone else.

I can’t wait for the mounds of fat bastards that try in vain to force their corpulent frames through the doors of the law courts to sue those evil burger and pie manufacturers that made their lives so miserable.

I’ve been known to be a bit over weight on occasion in my own life. It’s not a good place to be, and can negatively effect your life and your health. But it was my own bloody fault! Nobody ever force-fed me a kebab, threatened me with an éclair or used duress to encourage me to have one more slice of pie. It was all my own work.

Perhaps people should keep in mind though, before waddling to the phone to call a lawyer, you only get rights because you have responsibilities. Gradually allow the latter to be nibbled away, and you may wake up one day to realise neither is left in the larder.

A Queer Belief System...

Vatican bars prelate in gay row

The Vatican has confirmed local newspaper reports that a high-ranking Catholic priest has been suspended.
The man, Tommaso Stenico, who works in the department in charge of clergy around the world, appeared on Italian TV earlier this month admitting that he was gay.
The prelate had been suspended pending further investigation, said Vatican spokesman Father Frederico Lombari.
He says he was interviewed "fraudulently" with a hidden camera and now denies his earlier statement.
In a letter published in an Italian online newspaper, Petrus, Stenico writes: "I said I was homosexual in order to unmask those who really are."
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/7043056.stm for the full story….

I don't know where to begin, this story works on so many levels for me.

In the first few paragraphs of this article, we get to see the Catholic church doing it's bit towards my dream of a religion free society, by playing the good old homophobia card. Goodbye forever to a few more 'believers' every time they flag that old chestnut up.

We also get another of my favourite god-botherer types showing his true colours, the classic Cherry Picker, whose approach is: "I believe in this stuff enough to make a career out of it, but I'll cherry pick which of the clearly defined sins of my faith I actually want to take any notice of, and conveniently ignore the ones that are unacceptable to me."

Finally, our Cherry Picker chooses to deny everything, meaning he was lying when he gave the interview, or he's lying now, either of which fits in with the standard operating procedures of church representatives since time began.

Some handy clarifications for other Catholic Priests confused by these issues:

1 According to your religion, homosexuality is a sin. No amount of creative 'interpretation' can change it. Accept it, or accept you don't really believe in it.

2 If you don't tell anyone, you will probably get away with it, just as a large proportion of priests throughout history have. Though it may be safer to restrict yourself to underage sexual partners. Your bosses are generally less likely to want to announce that particular habit if you get caught.

3 You may punish yourself your whole life for your inner secret, but don't worry, God won't. To do that, he'd have to exist, and you know deep down that he doesn't really don't you?

The Incompetence Zoo...

It’s quite astounding to listen to the ongoing saga of Jean Charles de Menezes murder by the police. And I use the term ‘murder’, purposely, because under any other circumstances, and if those responsible hadn’t already been given a ‘get out of jail free card’, that is what it would be.

Just look at the damning evidence that shows why he deserved to be repeatedly shot in public…… (From BBC News)

Ivor, an undercover officer who held Mr de Menezes as he was shot in the head, told the court how he had earlier seen the Brazilian get off a bus in Brixton town centre - and then very quickly rejoin it.

Mr de Menezes had got off the bus and began walking towards the Brixton Underground Station - but after 20 metres turned back when he saw the station was temporarily closed.

Ivor had been on the same bus watching the target - but did not rejoin it out of fear of compromising the surveillance.

However, he reported Mr de Menezes's movements on his radio, but had not seen the Tube station was closed.

And it could have been an even bigger example of a complete balls up by all concerned……

On the first day of his evidence, Ivor had told the court how he acted to restrain Mr de Menezes in the Tube carriage after seeing armed officers rush onto the platform.

In the confusion, firearms officers dragged Ivor out of the train and levelled guns against his chest and head.

He was dressed almost identically to the suspect and carrying a rucksack.

So, a guy is brutally shot for getting off a bus, then getting back on, and in the midst of this high level surveillance operation, the armed lunatics that are supposed to protect the general public almost shot a fellow officer. Did any of these idiots actually turn up for the meeting that morning to see what the days work entailed?

Of course, it’s all irrelevant. Because who will end up paying the possibly unlimited fine that can be levied as a punishment for this debacle? You the taxpayer of course. If not directly, then in terms of reduced police services that will undoubtedly accompany it.

Keep in mind, that chief monkey in this incompetence zoo, Met Police Chief Sir Ian Blair, is the same person responsible for today backing plans to extend detention without trial from 28 days to 90 days for terror suspects.

Whatever happened to the head of an organisation taking responsibility for its actions? All the while we have a tool of oppression and dictatorship at the helm of the police force, none of us are safe to walk the streets. Let alone change our minds about a bus trip….

The Evil That Is Religion....

It took the ugly appearance of one of my pet subjects to drag me back to my much neglected blog today.

HIV-infected condoms sent to kill Africans, claims archbishop

Chris McGreal, Africa correspondent

Thursday September 27, 2007
The Guardian

Mozambique's Roman Catholic archbishop has accused European condom manufacturers of deliberately infecting their products with HIV "in order to finish quickly the African people".

The archbishop of Maputo, Francisco Chimoio, told the BBC that he had specific information about a plot to kill off Africans. "I know that there are two countries in Europe ... making condoms with the virus, on purpose," he alleged. But he refused to name the countries.

What exactly is going on in the minds of anyone who allows a man with such outrageously offensive opinions to be in a position of influence or power?

Whilst millions of human beings die from a disease that is, in many ways, avoidable, the catholic church, as if it did not have enough blood on it's hands throughout history, enables this spiteful evil little man to make remarks that will undoubtedly lead to yet more deaths.

Hopefully one piece of good to come from this latest piece of bile from the religious slavers is that somewhere in the world someone will be shocked enough by the statement to release themselves from religious slavery. Sadly their freedom will doubtless be bought by the deaths of the uneducated slaves who accept this evil little man's message at face value.

Symbols of Propaganda....

I was disgusted to see on BBC tv this morning a god-botherer defending the position of a sixteen year old currently undertaking a high court action to allow the wearing of a 'chastity ring' in school.

The child's school has a no-jewellery policy, and doubtless prompted by over zealous parents, the child has decided to pursue this spurious nonsense through the courts.

Everyone involved should be ashamed of themselves frankly. Using a child to promote religious propaganda is a particularly low tactic being used by those who feel the need for imaginary friends in their lives.

In spite of what she may think, this child is a minor. She is NOT a christian child. There is no such thing, as Richard Dawkins points out, there are only children of christian parents.

All religion is slavery. Free yourself.

Thank You.....

Sunday morning, 11am.
And so, as the best 41st birthday party I've ever had, begins to wind down (or for me at least, the three blonde beauties are still milking the Karaoke video game for all it's worth), I find myself once again unable to understand what exactly I did to be so fortunate as to have the world's finest people as my friends.

I never cease to be astounded by the loyalty, comfort, pleasure and general sense of well being that envelopes me in their presence.

If you gain nothing more from life than friends, you have fully lived.

Let Out & Locked In....

I know little, and frankly care even less about Paris Hilton. She represents to me a portion of society that serves less purpose than a chocolate fire-guard.

I base this probably entirely unfair, and wholly un-considered opinion on nothing more solid than my own good old fashioned inverted snobbery, with a measure of very human envy thrown in, but hey, I am after all, only human.

I do know however, that her being released after only three days of her sentence is absolute proof that the US justice system is as corrupt as any banana republic any where on earth. How could any unfortunate resident of that nation ever trust the legal system again?

Unless they happen to be a millionaire of course.

And In Other News.....

Continuing with my theme of recklessly commenting on people I know nothing about, I'm proud to say I have so far managed to avoid even accidentally tuning in to that amazing piece of TV excrement, Big Brother.

I'd like to go on record as saying that anyone stupid enough to go on the show deserves nothing less than complete ridicule for the rest of their lives, or perhaps pity. I'm not entirely sure.

What I do know is the people who produce this obscene human zoo, make The Jerry Springer Show seem like a session of sensitive counselling. Sadly the viewing figures demonstrate that there will always be plenty of people around so insecure about their own inadequacies, that they have to gain solace from watching others even less well balanced than themselves.

Back Again....

Ok, so two and a half months without blogging is a bit lame. Not exactly going to win me any awards for productivity is it?

But I make no apologies, sometimes real life takes over, or one just doesn't have the inspiration.

So, what's been happening in Stevie's world? Well, unsurprisingly, lots more of the same, the new house has left me with little desire to venture out socially, finally having enough space to entertain at home has meant that this has more or less become 'Crack On Central'. My rants have once more taken the form of verbal diatribes for the Crack On audience only, until now at least.

The biggest event in the last couple of months has been my first trip to Ethiopia as part of the team involved in assisting Ethiopia to Trademark & License it's fine coffees.
It is a truly amazing place, and cliched as it might seem, having lived my whole life in the UK, such a visit does entirely change one's perspective on many things.

The starkest contrast I had to face was the fact that every Ethiopian I met was immensely friendly and dignified, yet commonly living in a society with levels of poverty that few Europeans of my generation will ever have experienced. In two weeks I did not meet a single Ethiopian that was not immediately friendly, hospitable and welcoming, something I could not say I have felt from any other place in the world including home.

I've taken the decision that this is not the place to talk about my work in too much detail, but if you want to find out more about the project, please take a look at www.ethiopiancoffeenetwork.com and if you have the chance, try to visit www.blackgoldmovie.com Black Gold is an incredible movie launching in the UK this weekend by Nick & Marc Francis, that highlights some of the issues in the Ethiopian coffee sector.

The only down side to my trip is that I started smoking again after a year and a half smoke free, but that will change on July 1st, when our police state effectively criminalizes a large part of the population whilst being supported by the tax from it's addiction. It seemed like a good day to stop once again, if only to avoid adding another thing to the list of activities I indulge in that society deems unacceptable.

Talking of our wonderful Police State....
Our soon to be Lord and Master, Gordon Brown has once more indicated that he intends to attempt to convince MPs of the need to imprison people without trial or justification for up to 90 days under anti-terrorist laws. At 28 days, we already have double the detention without charge time period of any other developed country.

Now I'm not a person who you will hear complain about locking up and throwing away the proverbial key, when there is firm evidence that an individual has been involved in plotting or carrying out terrorism against this nation. But if the police do not have enough evidence to charge someone within a month of arrest, what possible justification can there be to extending that period, and why were they arrested in the first place if there was no evidence either present or likely to come to light?

One of the few disadvantages of living in what will in my opinion be viewed by future historians as the easiest period in western history, (before we descend once again into hardship for the majority, through climate change and our apparent inability to consider the bigger picture)...is the complacency that seems to be silently infecting people when it comes to the erosion of their individual rights to make choices.

Previous generations suffered through much of their lives to one degree or another, and one of the things that came out of that suffering was much greater freedom for the majority in our part of the world at least.

It would be a shame if such a hard won prize was to quietly be eaten away, with little more than a whimper of protest.

A Benefit To Britain At Any Cost? .........

After a forced absence due to my moving house, (living without an internet connection is both freeing and irritating in equal measure it seems) I'm back with a good old fashioned whinge, and it's about a fairly predictable subject I suppose.

I'm going to have a little moan about the 2012 Olympic budget figures. Now I know there are some out there who think it's a typical British reaction to jump right in with a moan about any sort of big project as soon as it's price goes up, prices always go up right?
You have to expect an increase in the budget of these things right?
The budgets we hear at the beginning of a project can't possibly take changes into consideration can they?

What nonsense. From the announcement of our successful bid for the games, when a budget of £2.4bn, the cost has now risen to a massive £9.35bn, almost quadrupling!

In what sort of lala land is it acceptable for this sort of bare-faced bullshit to take place? Ours apparently.

Are we actually being told that the 2012 Olympics being held in London is a good thing at any cost? If this is the case, could we not have been given an honest budget figure in the first place and allowed to make that decision for ourselves?

I've been in the pro-bid camp all along in so far as the games can shine a very positive light on what I happen to think is the greatest city in the world.

I just wish we could find a way to have this, and most other big build projects that are undertaken these days, managed and budgeted with something resembling a degree of honesty and integrity.
Instead we are treated like some confused granny being fleeced by a dodgy builder, who keeps putting his quote price up once he's already got your roof off.

That's Gratitude For You.....

It's been announced, once again, that Nurses annual pay increases will be lower than the rate of inflation. They are to receive a total increase of 2.5% on the year, which compares to a 4.2% inflation rate. Effectively a pay cut.

It seems to me that all my life I've heard the same story, yet nobody in government, regardless of their political colour, (what little difference there is these days) makes any effort to do anything about it.

Why exactly do we as a nation sit back and let the people who work tirelessly to heal us, be treated this way, whilst successive administrations vote themselves ever bigger pay increases?

Are we really that ungrateful?

One Last Blast From NTHELL.....

Yes, they've managed it. In spite of passing their number-one rated anti-customer service organisation off to someone else, (celebrity facial-hair-wearer Richard Branson), good old NTL have managed to do us all up the proverbial just one more time.
As some of you will already know, Branson's megalomaniac company Virgin has taken over NTL now, and first day of Virgin Media being the new boss, and their little dispute with SKY means customers lose a whole bunch of the TV channels from their screen. Fear not though, in true NTL style, Virgin Media don't of course see this as not giving us something we're already paying for, these were 'free' channels of course.

A bit like you going along to a pop concert, but when you get there, there's no lights, but you can't moan, you're paying for the music right? The light show was free wasn't it?

You'll be pleased to hear I'm moving house soon, and therefore finally consigning my cable subscription to history. No more moans about customer service nightmares......... but then I'm moving to SKY, so watch this space.....

Nanny Strikes Again......

Good to see yet another small piece of personal freedom being eaten away this week as Nanny decides we now need stricter enforcement on mobile phone use in cars.

It sickens me to see all these evangelical police morons wheeled out in television interviews, telling us very sternly how very dangerous it is to use your mobile whilst in motion. The radio ad campaign focuses on telling us how dangerous it is to do two things at once....what? Like listening to a dumb-arsed radio ad and driving at the same time you mean?

What next I wonder? Banning passengers in case they distract you by talking? And what about smoking? Picking one's nose? Eating a chocolate bar? (as I incidentally watched a fine officer of the law doing whilst driving in heavy traffic on the A3 yesterday).

Yes, all these things are a little more dangerous than giving driving your 100% attention, but no-one except those who passed their driving test in the last three days actually does that!

How about the government and their chief tax collectors, the boys in blue, get off our case for a change and stop coming up with new ways to criminalize the population?

Fascism seems to have stopped sneaking in the back door these days and comes along through the front, bold as brass, and announcing it's arrival with TV and radio advertising Her Goebbels would have killed for in his propaganda ministry.

I Dont Know Where It Goes....

Time just slips by; I can't believe it's been over two weeks since I posted last. Frankly it's a good job nobody's reading this, otherwise you'd be most disappointed with my productivity levels.

So, what's happening in the world? Well, I've learned a few things in the last couple of weeks...

1, Little Miss Sunshine is not, in fact a lame chick flick as you might imagine, but is in fact highly entertaining. I apologise to the producers and my other half for my very man-like assumption before seeing the movie.

2, In spite of NTL's aim to be the worlds worst customer service organisation, they are still topped by that old faithful, any railway (in this case South West Trains) employee. Special mention goes out to the miserable bastards at Walton on Thames station, who on a daily basis manage to demonstrate all the charm and personality of a concentration camp guard, in spite of all being in apparently good health, employed, and not with a great deal to be pissed off about in life.

3, No matter how old you get some of the very best things in life can still get even better.

4, Tinned fruit smoothies are awesome!

5, I accept that Windows new MediaCentre is quite sexy but IE7 is the spawn of the devil and another step towards Gates attempt at world domination.

6, If someone doesn't assassinate Ken Livingstone, we'll have congestion charging out as far as Heathrow by the end of 2007. One of the thankfully few things I shared with Maggie Thatcher is a sometimes irrational, yet always powerful dislike of this odious little man and everything he touches.

That's it for now, but it is only Sunday afternoon, there's plenty of time for me to find something to moan about yet this weekend.

Just One More Thing....

I was looking for a picture to illustrate the last post, and whilst searching for a suitable 'CHAV' image, stumbled across this which I have to share with the rest of the world. Apologies to any non-Brits who may not get this one, ask a Brit friend, they'll explain.

Absolutely priceless.....

Life Imitating Art....

I saw a comedy sketch a while ago, in which an irritating man on a train goes through his entire mobile phone book, telling each of his friends the same banal story of his day, far too loudly, and to the annoyance of fellow passengers.

I have to admit, I thought it was a bit over the top, as I'm one of those people who things that, as long as you're maintaining a respectable (i.e. normal conversational level) volume, talking on the phone on a train does not deserve the sneers of others, or the placing of those annoying little window stickers declaring this to be a 'quiet zone'.

Just because the little Nazi's who like to rule the lives of others have found a new thing to moan about, it doesn't make you a criminal if you'd like to tell your partner you're on the way home from work, or need a lift from the station for fucks sake.

That said, I was shocked to find myself sitting next to a classic CHAV on the train yesterday who proceeded to do exactly as the man in the sketch did, informing all of us at full volume, at least three times, all about the frankly boring events of his weekend, including a less than veiled reference to his own sexual conquests.

So to the baseball-cap wearing, shell-suited fucktard on the train from Waterloo to Basingstoke, thanks for giving the anti-freedom Nazi's of South-West Trains an excuse to try to ban yet another normal activity. Twat.

More From The Nice People At NTL........

Yet again I find myself apologising for my lack of productivity in the blog department. In my defence, I'm actually starting to get a lot busier in the world of work these days, a concept I would not have even been able to contemplate some months ago!

Today's piece marks a return to one of my favourite topics, for ranting, and one of my least favourite organisations, you guessed it, good old NTL.

Latest in their catalogue of ways to prove they could not perform any amount of customer service if their collective balls were placed in a vice, and the level to which it was being tightened depended upon it, comes from a friend of mine who was due to have their services connected at his new home earlier this month. He received his little text message reminder the day before installation was due, and on the long awaited day, we sat eagerly awaiting the wonderful ability to once again connect to the world outside his flat.
And we waited.
And waited.
And waited.
We gave up waiting, and called those wonderful people at NTL for an update. Well didn't we chuckle when it was explained that the appointment had been cancelled, and rescheduled for another date, IN FIVE WEEKS TIME!!
Really? By whom exactly? Some faffing about, a little more time with the holding music, and some traditional buck-passing ensued before we were informed that, they did not know who had changed the date for installation.
Ok, my friend, being far more patient than I, (I would have reached down the phone and ripped out the persons heart by now had it been physically possible, as we all know that employees of this company deserve to die horribly) asks how soon this error can be rectified, as they had at least accepted it was not him that cancelled the appointment......

Not until the date in five weeks time, as this was the earliest available slot he was told.

He has since had tv/telephone and broadband installed within a week via SKY & BT, it took him all of 30 seconds on the phone to NTL to explain why he wished to withdraw from the planned agreement, and he was dealt with by someone who had obviously dealt with many such cancellations.

Do these wankers really think that we are so stupid that when they change the company name to Virgin Media soon we will assume all is now well and they will become a glorious example of the best in customer service?

Mr Branson, pull out of this deal now, or risk being associated with a company with a worse record in customer relations than the manufacturers of Zyklon B.

Roll Out The Barrel...

There was disappointment in Branscombe, Devon this week when only two contestants turned up for the 51st annual barrel rolling contest. Recent police attempts to cordon off the town are said to have caused the low turn-out. A spokesman has said that the 1st prize of 50 BMW motorcycles is likely to instead be donated to 'local good causes'.

On Second Thoughts....

It's no great secret to anyone who knows me, that in about three years or so I'm intending to head round the world to Melbourne to live, the home of my fiancée’s parents, and a fair number of our friends. From time to time though, I have to admit to having some concerns about such a move. Two occasions for concern have appeared in the news today.

Flagging Patriotism...
First is the report that organisers of Big Day Out, Australia's Sydney based but nationwide series of rock concerts, have urged those attending not to bring national flags along, on the grounds that it may incite racial tension. Quite rightly, many are up in arms at this attempt to prevent people demonstrating their allegiance to their home nation, by pandering to the growing number of whinging aussies who, sadly like some of our own whinging poms, think that respecting the wishes of every race or nation other than ones own is the only way to avoid conflict.
One keen advocate of the aussies right to wave their flag is Prime Minister John "Australia for USA Membership" Howard, as he should be. One has to laugh though, at his Bush-like ability to say the wrong thing, whilst doing the right thing. He is quoted as saying...

"The event organisers should not ram their peculiar political views down the throats of young Australians who are only interested in a good day out."

Does this mean, I wonder that he's changed his nation's draconian views on recreational drug use by 'young Australians who are only interested in a good day out'? Or is he still happy to allow his government to ram that particular peculiar political view down their throats?

One Step Closer to Australia USA...
One less trivial, and frankly more disturbing story also in the news today is that of Allen Jasson below...

From BBC News
Flight ban for anti-Bush T-shirt
A passenger barred from a Qantas airlines flight for wearing a T-shirt depicting US President George Bush as a terrorist has threatened legal action. Allen Jasson said he was sticking up for the principle of free speech by challenging the decision by the Australian flag carrier. Mr Jasson was stopped as he was about to board the flight from Melbourne to London last Friday. Qantas said the T-shirt had potential to offend other passengers. The T-shift features an image of President George W Bush, along with the slogan "World's Number One Terrorist".

Since when does the operator of an airline get to set itself up as defender of the public’s sensibilities? Where do we go from here? Perhaps the wearing of a pair of Union Jack shorts on the flight home from another pointless England cricket tour will be banned in case it offends one of the many nations we've upset over the years? Or that "I Love Australia" t-shirt you bought from the airport before heading home will be forcibly removed before you fly on the off chance that a delegation from an Aboriginal rights group might be on the same flight?

Airline travel is becoming more and more irritating of late, on the back of this insane fear of anyone with a long beard, a tan, and an unusual hat. Can anyone not see that some of these measures, introduced in the name of 'security' are sometimes not only ridiculous, but in instances like this, also bordering on the fascist?

What I've seen of Melbourne in the little time I've spent there, I've liked enough to be happy to call home with my fiancée at some point in the future, but I'm beginning to think it's going to seem a little more like moving to Alabama than Australia.

Big Brother Shite-Fest Shocker....

I'm in a difficult situation when it comes to the current fuss over Channel 4's shite-fest, Celebrity Big Brother.
It will come as no massive surprise to you, but I'm definitely of the mind that this sort of pointless tripe is yet another reason to get off one's arse and find a hobby rather than turn on the tv.

However, I have to of course bow to the fact that this latest excuse for un-important 'celebrities' to spread their mediocrity to a greater audience is very much in the news at the moment. This brings me to my dilemma, for I find myself wishing to comment on the programmes un-invited presence in my consciousness, (rather like an irritating zit, you know you ought not to pick at), even though I still refuse to watch the damn thing.

Therefore you will have to excuse me if I comment, without having had first hand experience of the alleged racism that I'm told is permeating the show currently.

We live in a country where racism is illegal. So correct me if I'm wrong, but if someone's broken the law, is there not justification for PC Do-gooder to go into this little nest of has-beens and question or possibly arrest someone? Or at the very least insist the accused/victims be removed immediately and questioned?

The alternative is that no illegality has occurred, and we are just witnessing some form of mass hysteria over the completely unimportant mockney ramblings of a fat girl from Essex with delusions of relevance, and the equally unimportant hurt feelings of a spoilt little rich girl from India too stupid to realise that she'd get more than just an increase in her fame levels amongst non-Asian audiences by being short-sighted enough to agree to come on this bloody show.

Twenty odd MPs have signed something or other, the Chancellor's visit to India is, in the words of the BBC 'overshadowed', half the nation is up in arms, and most of the nations press would not hold the front page for a royal death if it happened right now, just on the off chance that Miss Piggy or the Bollywood Bore might have another little tiff.

Wankers.

Slow News Day.....

From the BBC
Misbah Mother Drops Custody Claim

The mother of schoolgirl Misbah Rana has dropped her claim for custody of her daughter, the Supreme Court in Pakistan has heard.
The 12-year-old, also known as Molly Campbell, left Scotland without her mother's consent last August to be with her father, Sajad Rana.
Misbah's mother, Louise Campbell, had interim custody of her daughter.
The court in Islamabad had been expected to make a ruling on whether Misbah should return to the UK.

Can you believe I switched on BBC News 24 this morning to find this piece of un-interesting, completely insignificant information was the 'NEWS' that filled fully the first ten minutes of the BBC news broadcast?

With all the conflict, suffering and problems that goes on in the world today, and every day, that was the best the world's premiere news service could come up with. If it carries on like this I'll be forced to tune in to CNN, where 'World News' traditionally means anything to do with the USA.

Need A Little More Time?

I'd never have put myself down as a true lover of sleep. Some people have a real love affair going on with their bed, they just can't get enough zzzz's in their life. For them, paradise is all about long lie-ins, fluffy duvets and pillows.
Whilst I can appreciate the recovery benefits, sleep was always just a way to waste a third of your life in my book. One of the big fringe benefits of becoming a recreational drug user when I first signed up for the 'class A team', was the fact that I could fit in lots more stuff in all that wasted time when most of the world is sleeping.
Party all night, dance all night, read, watch tv, study, work or play, it's all extra time you get to fill with life's distractions and diversions. Ok, nature never entirely lets you get something for nothing, you do need to put in a few more hours on your back monday to friday if you party the whole weekend away. But in true Brit style, if you do it right, you can easily 'nick a bit'.

Going entirely without sleep just one night a week, could give you almost a whole extra day of life a month, or a massive two years and four months if you spread it over a whole lifetime of around 70 years! Just think what you could do with all that time.

Me? I like to make use of my extra time awake by sitting and writing stuff like this at 2am.

Well I never said you had to use the time wisely.

Death By Stupidity....

It's heartbreaking to see the beautiful face of five year old Ellie Lawrenson on the news at the moment. The poor innocent victim, not of a dangerous animal, but of a group of idiotic adults who did not have enough common sense to know that a pit bull should not be anywhere near a tiny defenceless human being.

There's no real point to thinking of punishing those supposedly 'responsible', though frankly responsibility is the last thing any of them has demonstrated. Ellies uncle will be tormented by this for life, as will her parents. On an individual level, that's almost certainly punishment enough.

Perhaps authorities should declare that from this point forward, a similar occurrence will lead to a mandatory jail term for the dog owners, and any adult allowing such a dog to be in the same house as a child. Though I doubt it would deter the morons who think there is any reason on earth to have such dangerous animals as pets. Only the death of a child close to them might do that.

There used to be an old saying, "You need a license to own a dog, but they let any bloody idiot have children".

Rest in peace little Ellie.

Here We Go Again....

Rarely can I remember having entered into a fresh new year with such high spirits. Now whether this is caused by residual traces of the New Years Eve party stimulations, or a genuine reflection of my state of mind, only time will tell, but on the first 'proper' day of 2007, (the 1st never counts, if you didn't sleep the night before, it still officially counts as being the NYE party of course) I feel pretty good.

As you'd expect from me, sharing my thoughts with you has been somewhat lacking over the last few weeks. It's not that I had nothing to say, but with the party season in full flight, I had plenty of opportunity to fall back on my original audience of friends and unfortunate bystanders, who fell victim to my rants and general oratorical fatuity (finally got round to using that one). So you out there in the wide world had to do without me for a while. I'm sure you survived ok.

So in the spirit of randomness, here are a few points that are bouncing around my mind as the new year begins.

Being in love is still far and away the best thing in the world. If you are, cherish it with every breath in your body, if you are not, you will know when you are by the way every other thing becomes insignificant in loves presence.

You get to chose your own friends. If you look around and find you are unhappy with them, it's your own fault. Either be prepared to deal with it, or move on. Some will prove to be worth every bit of effort, some will not, but you must decide which is which for yourself. Don't assume that every relationship will work, or continue to muddle through blindly when they do not. Sometimes you do have to let go.

Never underestimate the power of family relationships to still hurt, long after you thought you'd 'dealt' with them. Realising how much you still love your mum and dad, even if you'd convinced yourself that you'd never get along, is a shockingly powerful thing. Don't leave it too long to figure that out.

Mince pies are still one of the best things about Christmas. Religious nonsense is still the worst.

Watch "An Inconvenient Truth". If you don't come away from it with a desire to change things around you, take a long look at yourself. You are part of the problem.

I don't care if CSI is overly glamourised nonsense, it's great tv, but I wish they'd stop buggering about with torches in dark rooms and turn the bloody lights on!

House parties are still a far better option than clubbing on New Years Eve.

Life is still good.

And On Top Of That....

The bloody bureaucracy in the country is mind-numbing. My fiancée and I have set a date for our wedding, yet due to the mountain of red tape involved as she is from New Zealand, and I'm from England, we are not yet able to confirm the registrar.
So her plans for what should be the best day of every girls life are on hold, with a completely un-necessary stressful cloud hanging over them.

All this in spite of the fact that she's lived, worked and paid taxes here for four years, her Grand-parents were from the UK, we've lived together for three years, and her country has a Union bloody Jack in the corner of their flag.

Perhaps I should tell them she's from Rumania or Poland........

About As Welcome As A Fart In An Airplane.....

Flatulence leads to US Jet Divert
An American Airlines plane made an emergency landing in Nashville after passengers reported the smell of sulphur from burning matches.
The matches were found on the seat of a woman who had attempted to conceal the odour of flatulence with the matches, Nashville airport authorities said.
All 99 passengers and five crew left the plane while it was searched.
The woman was questioned by the FBI but released without charge and allowed to board another American Airlines flight.
"It was determined that she was trying to conceal body odour," said Lynne Lowrance of the Nashville Airport Authority.
She had "no malicious intent but had struck matches which is against [Transport Security Administration] rules," Ms Lowrance said.
The unidentified woman had an unspecified medical condition, Associated Press news agency said.
She was carrying safety matches, which the TSA allows in carry-on luggage.
The matches are not allowed to be struck, however.

The FBI called out because someone farted and lit a match. Good to see those US tax dollars are all going to good use as ever.

A Fond Farewell.....

Toinght is Knowwhere night. Anyone who knows me, will know how important a night that is to me, and how important those Knowwhere nights have been over the years.

Tonight, however, is a special Knowwhere night. It is my last as a promoter.

After an incredible five years on London's club scene, five years of meeting the most amazing people, five years of parties, dancing, fun and entertainment, it's time to call it a night.

It really has been the best five years of my life so far, and I'd like to use my own little bit of webspace here to just say 'thank you' to everyone who's made it so special for me. In particular I want to thank my great friends Pablo & Anthony Dean. Two of the best people on the planet.

I love you both guys. Thank You.

Yes, Of Course, It's All Our Fault....

From The BBC

Blair 'sorrow' over slave trade

Prime Minister Tony Blair has said he feels "deep sorrow" for Britain's role in the slave trade.

In an article for the New Nation newspaper, the prime minister said it had been "profoundly shameful".

But Mr Blair stopped short of issuing a full apology, which some commentators have demanded.

The government is reportedly setting out its plans for next year's bicentenary of the abolition of the slave trade.

Esther Stanford, of the Pan African Reparation Coalition, said all countries that had ever been involved in slavery should give a full apology.

"An apology is just the start - words mean nothing," she told BBC News.

"We're talking about an apology of substance which would then be followed by various reparative measures including financial compensation."

The whole idea of anyone apologising for the actions of long dead fellow countrymen is frankly the most wishy washy pile of shite in a whole world that talks too much and acts too little.

How the hell is it even a consideration that those of us now alive should be in any way responsible for the actions of those long dead?

And how is it that Esther Stanford can believe that she can do anything but harm to African causes by demanding that nations that were historically involved in slavery, should make reparations? Where does this rediculously misguided woman think this should end?
Perhaps With Egypt paying reparations to the Israelites? Or with Italians paying reperations to Britons, Gauls and Germans for what the Romans did? I assume that any 'reparations' would of course, once paid, be buried alongside the long dead victims? I'm sure she doesn't intend for anyone alive, and therefore not actually a victim of slavery, to actually make a profit from it?

Or perhaps the people who feel these issues deserve their time and attention should consider getting off their respective arses and spend that time and attention on helping their fellow man that are suffering in one way or another in the world, right here and right now?

Winchester Fails The Test....

From This Is Hampshire .net

Police to carry out drug tests outside pubs By Chris Semple

A MAJOR new drive to catch people on illegal drugs is being launched in Winchester tonight and is targeting young people visiting the city's pubs.

In a groundbreaking operation, police will be testing people on their way into four city pubs and stopping and searching anyone who gives a positive result.

It is one of the first times that the machine, called Ion-Track, has been used in the UK to test people on their way into venues. It can detect everything from cannabis to crack.

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Previous police operations have focused on testing people already suspected on having consumed illegal drugs, or on testing areas in pubs and clubs where drug use is suspected - such as toilets.

Now Hampshire Constab-ulary is to take the process one step further, rooting out drug users before they enter venues, and they have teamed up with Winchester's Pub-watch scheme to make the testing a compulsory condition of entry.

The initiative will get under way this evening with officers stationing themselves outside Savannahs, The Gaolhouse, O'Neills and Bar 31.

The testing will involve the door supervisor brushing a small tab across the tips of customers' fingers and then inserting the tab into the machine.

If the customer gives off a positive reading for any illegal substance they will be detained and searched by police. Those testing positive will also be banned from entering the pub that night, while anyone actually caught with drugs on them will be arrested.

Sgt Karen Fisher said: "An operation like this is a very successful way of tackling the drugs problem in Winchester city centre and the co-operation of the licensees and the public is invaluable to us."

The Ion-Track machine has already been used this year at clubs in Brighton and Hove and at various festivals throughout the summer including Winchester's Hi Fi.

Police in Kent and Wales also used the machine earlier this year to test for drug use among school pupils.

The £32,000 machine, which looks like a fax machine, picks up traces of drugs from a person's sweat and is so sensitive that it can even tell whether the person tested is a regular user of drugs or has just come into contact with them through something like a handshake.

As well as Class A drugs like crack and cocaine, the machine can also pick up Ecstasy, amphetamines, cannabis and date rape drugs such as GHB and Rohypnol.

The Irony of it, testing people for illegal drugs as they head into the place where you can legally get tanked up on the one drug the government makes a fortune in taxes from and society actively encourages you to partake in.

It's good to see the boys in blue of the Winchester constabulary have so much time on their hands. Doubtless no theft, muggings, murders, rapes or anything else to worry themselves about in that fine old city.

Except thats not actually the case.

In the period 2004-2005, according to "UpMyStreet" the website dedicated to telling you the best places (and worst) in the uk to live, there were around 1300 crimes against the person, 100 sexual offences, 500 thefts from vehicles and 300 burglaries in Winchester. Hardly paradise city is it? And in spite of what the 'War On Drugs' lobby will have you believe, the vast majority of offences commited are nothing whatever to do with someone trying to support a habit.

I bet they have one of the highest incidences of drivers being stopped too, as life is that 'dull' for the local plod.

I still say such offensive, facist tactics should be used on the houses of parliament without warning before being allowed to be unleashed on the general public. Be interesting to see the test results from our glorious leaders, and how keen they'd be to enforce these pathetic nanny laws from that point onwards....

Just Say No To Paracetamol........

Good old Great Britain and it's nannying laws.

Not content with telling us what we can put up our noses, down our throats or anywhere else for personal entertainment, the powers that be even have to stick their irritating beaks into how many headache tablets we can buy these days. Due to a large number of silly people trying to prematurely leap off of this mortal coil by overdosing on paracetamol, you can't actually buy more than two 16 tablet packs at any one time in your local Tesco, or anywhere else for that matter.

So if you're hoping to top yourself in this fashion, might I suggest you simply buy the maximum allowance of 32 tablets and wash them down with a large container of bleach, which you can still purchase without fear of breaking the law.

Black Gold.......

If you're the sort of person who has the ability to watch a movie, in spite of it having no explosions, car chases, love scenes or actors in it, and feel it was worthwhile, then you may well find "Black Gold" worth a watch.
An insightful look at the global coffee industry, it'll really make you think more about that first cup of the day in a new light.

The juxtaposition of seeing people hand sort individual coffee beans on one continent, for poverty level wages, within moments of watching the behaviour of entrants in the "World Barista Championships" and their bizarre self delusion that their 'skill' has the slightest importance in the big scheme of things......Simply astonishing stuff.

http://www.blackgoldmovie.com/

Perfect Planning Could Prevent Piss Poor Performance....

From BBC News

Cost of 2012 Olympics 'up £900m'

The expected cost of the 2012 London Olympic park has risen 40% since the games were won in July 2005, Culture Secretary Tessa Jowell has told MPs

Well what a bloody surprise. Exactly what part of forward planning do the morons that organise these massive projects not understand?

Whether it's the new stadium at Wembley, The Channel Tunnel, The Eurostar Terminal, or the 2012 Olympics project, there's always one thing these super-projects have in common. They will go ridiculously over budget, every single time.

Is it really impossible for the planners of such projects to not factor in at least some level of inflation, added costs and good old common sense? Or are they actually just talking complete shite when they put the proposals on the table in an effort to pull the wool over the eyes of the rather dim witted taxpayers who usually end up footing the bills one way or another?

I don't want to see companies fined or punished for crashing mindlessly through these budget ceilings every time as some people suggest. I want to see them putting forward genuine budgets and timescales in the first bloody place, and I have a sneaking suspicion that may be what everyone (except those who's pockets the projects will line) wants to see too.

How about the government minister who gives the final go-ahead to a project, being personally responsible for any costs over those they tell the public at the time of conception? We may see a few less getting given the go-ahead with such total dishonest disregard for the truth.

An Unfair Cop....

From The BBC News

Terror Law Review ‘By Christmas’

Home Secretary John Reid says he will finish his review of anti-terrorism measures before Christmas.

In an interview with the BBC, he said it may mean new laws - giving security services the "tools they need to counter terrorism".

He did not confirm whether they would include plans to increase the maximum time for which suspects can be detained without charge.

Tony Blair earlier said he still backed an increase from 28 days to 90 days.

Am I being dim here? I still can't see the reason security services want this extension. Are they really saying that they can be convinced enough that someone is involved in terrorism to arrest them, but that it could really take them up to three months to find enough evidence to convince the members of a jury of the same thing?

I'm generally pretty 'pro' the idea of giving the police a fair crack at doing their job. Whilst they may be a bit of a pain in the backside, if you're the sort of person who's lifestyle doesn't fit in with the way the lawmakers see things, (and I'm talking about disagreeing on issues like drug use, personal choices, nannying laws, not basic common sense social conventions like locking up murderers and rapists etc), but they do have a job to do.
Yes, some of them might even be a little over-zealous, but even people who regularly break a few laws in their lives soon get on the phone to the cops if their car gets nicked or their mum gets mugged. There are a few things in this country you can be arrested for, that I personally think are hugely invasive, but that doesn't mean I'd want to see a world without the boys in blue generally.

But are the police really so bad at collecting evidence, or so cuckolded by the Crown Prosecution Service, or just so much better than a jury at knowing what's good for us... that they need to have the legal right to effectively imprison someone for three months without trial?

Lest We Forget....

Today is Rememberance Sunday.
I've always felt the need to put my own politics aside on this day, because regardless of your belief or not in any conflict our nation is involved in, today is a day to remember those who have given their lives for us. For you and I.

Without them standing between us, and those we have found cause to fight, we would not have the freedom to live the lives that we do.

To the men and women of Great Britain's Armed Forces who have given their lives so that I might enjoy mine, I would like to offer my personal deep and heartfelt thanks and unending respect.

FEMA In A Spin...

A hurricane-like storm, two-thirds the diameter of Earth, is raging at Saturn's south pole, new images from Nasa's Cassini space probe reveal.

Measuring 5000 miles across, the storm is the first hurricane ever detected on a planet other than Earth.

In an earlier statement FEMA (The US Federal Emergency Mangement Agency) are reported to have said:

"You can't blame us, we only just heard about it too....erm, we've got a team on the way right now....erm..."

Like It Or Not, It Isn't Racism...

Nick Griffin, leader of the BNP is not a very nice person in my opinion. He's a fascist, and certainly as anyone can see, a racist. He, though he may be careful in how he words it these days, believes that people are lesser human beings based on the colour of their skin.

Any sane human being, with any level of education knows he is wrong.

He has today been found not guilty of inciting racial hatred, a charge based on his comments about Islam and Muslims, and lets be honest, expressing a dislike of Islam, or any other religion for that matter is NOT racism.

Yet again we are being blinded by political correctness when it comes to the real issues.
When did finding oneself unable to accept any given faith's version of the truth, and one's ability to voice that non-acceptance, become 'racism'?

It's the blurring of these two distinct issues that clouds many discussions on religion and racism today, and I have a sneaking suspicion it's a cloud that many people want to keep in place.

It gives racists like the BNP a pathetic little 'moral' victory in the courts, in the eyes of themselves and their followers, but it also gives the religious zealots more ammunition in their efforts to corrupt the minds of the young within muslim communities and convince them that westerners hate them simply for being different, when the majority certainly do not. In reality they are arguing about two seperate points.

All the while we let the two separate issues be treated as one, both problems will be insurmountable.

A Question For David....

My Question as posted on Webcameron, website of David Cameron, leader of the Opposition on 3rd November.

I'm extremly uneasy about the fact that we currently have a Prime Minister who openly consults an imaginary friend regarding life issues, and may, I assume, also do so when it comes to decisions that affect this nation.

In this politically correct era, it seems we are allowed to hold any belief, other than one that proclaims no religion has a basis in fact. To do so is to invite accusations of 'intolerance' and 'prejudice'. Is it intolerant to consider a follower of Thor or Isis rediculously out of touch, and to publicly say so? Or are we simply saying that if any given religion has enough followers it must then be accepted as acceptable itself?

Is Mr Cameron another otherwise educated man who is prepared to accept some sort of God without evidence? Or is he an Atheist? Or perhaps worst of all, is he a 'believer' who choses to keep his beliefs 'private' for fear of risking votes?

No answer from David as yet.

Beauty Incognito...

Pulchritude (PUL-KRUH-TOOD) Noun

That quality of appearance which pleases the eye, beauty, comliness, grace, loveliness.

Have you ever known a word so unlike it's meaning?

When Insanity Runs Riot....

From The Times Monday 30th October
When Evil Runs Riot

Rev Dr Peter Mullen

The Bishop of Bolton has asked supermarkets not to sell Hallowe’en nasties, such as masks of serial killers, to children. He is right to be concerned. Hallowe’en has become a celebration of sensational evil and nothing more.

Once, Halloween was celebrated for what it is: the Eve of All Hallows, All Saints Eve. Thus evil was placed in the context of the supremely good and the lesson taught that the light triumphs over dark. Perhaps the worst degeneration of our culture is shown in the fact that there is universal scepticism about God and universal fascination with the Devil. Modern people pride themselves on their critical faculties and feel competent to disbelieve in God, but in all things dark, nasty and satanic they are mindlessly credulous. This was G. K. Chesterton’s prediction of what would happen with the rise of secularisation: “When people stop believing in God, they don’t believe in nothing; they believe in anything.”

There is horror galore in the Bible and in the old European fairy stories, but the evil is always set in the overriding context of the good. Scripture and the brothers Grimm are moral tales. When we sever this moral link and dislocate good from evil, allowing evil to run riot and dominate the cultural agenda, we lose our ethical defence against evil.

When Rev Dr Peter Mullen wrote the above piece for The Times, he was I'm sure in the middle of an annual state of anxiety at the approach of hordes of little children performing the now expected round of U.S inspired begging we all have to endure for Halloween these days.

While I share the Reverend Doctor's apparent distaste for the event, I can't help but raise issue with his naive reasoning. Halloween is far from a 'celebration of sensational evil' as he so dramatically puts it. These days it’s yet another celebration of capitalism, another excuse for the marketers of pointless products to part the all too willing from their cash.

To describe the activities of ten year olds dressing in silly costumes and touting for some free sweets, in such terms is frankly ridiculous.

He's right that Halloween was once celebrated as 'All Saints Eve'. It was also once a much older Pagan festival until Pope Gregory III moved All Saints Day to 1st of November to obliterate the old celebrations. Neither set of imaginary beliefs on arbitrary dates are any more truthful in their basis than the other.

To define a "growing universal scepticism about God" as a degeneration of our culture is not only insulting but wholly inaccurate. If anything it represents a degeneration of blind acceptance in one of a sadly all too long list of fantastic creation myths.

Where I wonder does he base his assumption that those who now accept God is a myth, would then be "mindlessly credulous" of other parts of that same myth?

His final arrogance in apparently concluding that we cannot have a moral code without embracing his own favourite brand of myth is sadly typical of the church.

His example of Grimm Fairy Tales alongside that of Scripture as moral guides actually demonstrates that we as humans do not need religion or God to make moral decisions or influence one another to do so.

The sooner we accept that we, and not some imaginary powers are the root of all good and evil, the sooner we can focus our efforts on nurturing the former and combating the latter, rather than waste our valuable energies and talents indulging pre-medieval fantasies.

Phrase Of The Day...

"Oratorical Fatuity",
excellent phrase, from 'Paris In The 20th Century' by Jules Verne, not sure if he should get the credit or the translator should though....

Another One For The List....

Today I'd like to welcome (yet) another group of people into my ever growing club for human beings that need, for all our sakes, to be removed from the planet.

I've just spent some time queing at the airport, seeing off my lovely other half, and, surprise, surprise, we had to spend some time snaking back and forth through those webbing barriers to make our way to far too few open check in desks. Now you may have figured out that I'm not what you'd call a patient person, so it will come as no surprise that I was getting a little grumpy. However, I soon realised that the target of my anger was ill-considered. I'd taken it upon myself to assume this was typical disregard for their customers by yet another faceless corperation, but I was wrong. I realised that what causes these delays and seemlessly endless lines, is in fact the dumb customers.

In the space of ten or fifteen minutes, I lost count of the number of fuckwits who wasted precious time with one of the clerks, either trying to convince the poor member of staff that the lorry sized item in front of them could not possibly weigh as much as those scales were saying, or, (and this was the really annoying bit) trying to shove a 'carry-on' bag the size of a small African country into the little metal 'size-guide' that sits alongside the check in desk.

Have these people never been on a fucking plane before?? You spend the entire journey sitting in one bloody seat! What the hell could you possibly want to take with you that is so damn big? Because if you do manage to just about squeeze that piece of luggage into the little frame, you are then going to piss everybody off again, when you try to force it into the tiny little overhead locker on the plane, blocking the aisle for another ten minutes into the bargain.

If you can't get your entire personal needs for a few short hours sitting in one seat, into a very small bag, you have failed basic human survival lesson 1, and should not set foot outside your house, let alone endangering the lives of others by being in a public place.

I would like a new rule please. Anyone who's carry-on bag does not fit into the metal frame, has the offending bag placed into a bin and burned in front of the whole queue. No payback, no compensation, just a valuable lesson learned for next time they fly.

A Subject Close To My Heart...

Starbucks, the coffee beans and the copyright row that cost Ethiopia £47m

Ashley Seager

Thursday October 26, 2006 The Guardian

Starbucks, the giant US coffee chain, has used its muscle to block an attempt by Ethiopia's farmers to copyright their most famous coffee bean types, denying them potential earnings of up to £47m a year, said Oxfam.The development agency said the Ethiopian government last year filed copyright applications to trademark its most famous coffee names - Sidamo, Harar and Yirgacheffe. Securing the rights to these names would enable the impoverished African country to control their use in the market and allow farmers to receive a greater share of the retail price.

The move would have increased its annual export earnings from coffee by 25%.But Oxfam said Starbucks, which enjoyed a 22% rise in annual global turnover to £7.8bn in the year to October, has acted to block Ethiopia's application to the US patent and trademark office. The USPTO has denied Ethiopia's applications for Sidamo and Harar, creating serious obstacles for its project.

Oxfam had a one-year cooperation agreement in 2004 with Starbucks which saw both provide support to coffee farmers in Ethiopia as part of wider attempts to reduce poverty in the country. But Oxfam now feels that the Seattle-based company's attitude is questionable. Phil Bloomer, Oxfam's policy director, said: "Starbucks has made some progress towards helping poor farmers in recent years, but their behaviour on this occasion is a huge backwards step, and raises serious questions about the depth of their commitment to the welfare of their suppliers. By acting responsibly, they could set an example for others by supporting Ethiopia's plan to help the 15 million struggling Ethiopian farmers who depend on coffee for their survival."

Fitsum Hailu, of the Ethiopian embassy in the US, added: "Struggling Ethiopian farmers should be able to realise a greater portion of the value our coffee commands on the international market. This project is innovative- and a unique opportunity for our farmers to be empowered in the arena of international trade."

Starbucks, whose annual turnover is equivalent to about three quarters of Ethiopia's entire gross domestic product, said in a statement it had never "filed an opposition to the Ethiopian government's trademark application". However, Ron Layton, head of Light Years IP, a Washington-based intellectual property rights organisation that is advising the Ethiopian government, said that in 2004 Starbucks had filed a trademark application with the word "Sidamo" to the USPTO. The USPTO then judged that Ethiopia's application a year later had to be rejected because the word was already the subject of Starbucks' application. When Starbucks' application lapsed this June, the US National Coffee Association, of which Starbucks is a leading member, objected to the Ethiopian application. NCA representatives admitted to the Ethiopians and Mr Layton that Starbucks had prompted their opposition.

"Intellectual property ownership now makes up a huge proportion of the total value of world trade but rich countries and businesses capture most of this. Ethiopia, the birthplace of coffee, and one of the poorest countries in the world, is trying to assert its rights and capture more value from its product. It should be helped, not hindered," said Mr Layton. Starbucks insisted, however, that it was committed to paying premium prices to producers in more than 27 countries and its purchases of Ethiopian coffee had grown by more than 400% in the past four years. It said it paid an average of $1.23 (65p) per pound last year, 23% above average market prices. Tadesse Meskela, head of the Oromia coffee farmers cooperative union in Ethiopia, was unimpressed, however. "Coffee shops can sell Sidamo and Harar coffees for up to £14 a pound because of the beans' specialty status. But Ethiopian coffee farmers only earn between 30p and 59p for their crop, barely enough to cover the cost of production.

"We sell organic coffee for less than £1 a pound but that pound can make 52 specials in coffee shops selling for £2 each, meaning the retailer is selling it for £104. The people who are producing this in Ethiopia don't have enough food, clean water or health centres. "Farmers are losing out while others in the chain are making huge amounts of money. That is hugely unfair." Ethiopia is continuing to pursue its trademark applications in the US. It is also asking Starbucks and other companies to sign voluntary licensing agreements that immediately acknowledge the country's ownership of the coffee names, regardless of whether they have been issued with a trademark.

I'm Royal Too....

Also From The Daily Mail (Got to stop reading that rubbish!)

An accountant from Jersey who believes he is the secret son of Princess Margaret has launched a High Court bid to prove his outlandish claim to Royal blood.
Robert Brown is convinced the Queen's younger sister managed to conceal a pregnancy from public eye six years before the birth of her legitimate son.
The 51-year-old believes his birth in Nairobi, Kenya in 1955 may have been the result of on an affair between the late Princess and her former beau Group Captain Peter Townsend.
He says his father may also have been Robin Douglas-Home, with whom the Princess had a well publicised affair in the 1960s.

Utter tosh! Princess Margaret was in fact my mummy actually! I am the result of a little known affair between HRH and Pete Townsend of Rock legends The Who, the pair had a little fling while Pete was working in London re-mastering the My Generation album back in 66. They split after Pete was no longer able to deal with mummy's heavy drink and drug habits. This makes me not only 12th in line to the throne, but entitles me to as many free visits to Roger Daltry's Sussex trout farms as I like, and makes me rather good at swinging guitars around my head. Actually.

BA Employs Loony By Mistake...

From The Daily Mail
BA refuses to back down in case of cross wearing Christian

British Airways refused to back down last night over its ban on check-in worker Nadia Eweida wearing a cross around her neck. The airline has refused to clear the committed Christian for breaking BA's strict dress code and are expected to take further disciplinary action against her.

Good oh, another little nibble away at the loonies! Keep the bans coming people, lets make it clear that if you persist in believing fairy stories into adulthood, you are not fit to do grown up jobs.

Although there is something to be said for loonies identifying themselves for the rest of us....

Punishment Fit For The Crime....

From BBC News
Lady McCartney to sue newspapers
Heather Mills McCartney is to sue two newspapers over "false, damaging and immensely upsetting" claims surrounding her divorce from Sir Paul McCartney.
Legal proceedings will be taken against the London Evening Standard and Daily Mail, lawyers for the 38-year-old said.
Solicitors Mishcon de Reya added that legal action will also be taken against The Sun.

Well I for one hope she wins, though I'd get more pleasure from it if the vermin who pursue people this way were themselves actually punished as a result, rather than it ending up with some faceless corporation having to pay a big cash settlement.

The validity of these type of cases would be better accepted all round if those responsible for the 'upsetting' words were in some way publicly pilloried rather than the supposed victim getting big wedges of cash.

In fact, I think actually throwing the offender in a set of stocks outside their victims front gate for a week, would be a most excellent punishment for any scuzzy little worm who's stock in trade is the ins & outs of another human beings personal relationships, though obviously by that criteria, we'd have to make room alongside them for divorce lawyers as well.

Active Atheism...

Isn't it time YOU came out of the closet?
I know you are out there.

There are millions of you in this country, just like me, who flinch every time a politician refers to 'God', or a survivor of some incident blindly thanks 'the Lord' for saving them, (rather than the dozens of firefighters, nurses and support workers still usually cleaning up in the background).

You are the same people who feel the anger rise when an Islamic fundamentalist takes yet another life in the misguided hope that a room full of virgins await him in heaven, or when a right-wing Christian fundamentalist declares once again the evils of the homosexuals and the AIDS curse they have brought upon us?

We live in an age when we can no longer sit back and say 'Let them have their harmless beliefs, lets tolerate each other's faiths.' Because those beliefs are no longer harmless.

Within the bosom of the 'moderates' of all faiths, festers the evil that is fundamentalism.
All the while 'moderates' exist, and pass on their false dogmas to the young, there will be those among them that will use those dogmas to their own ends.
Moderates are in many ways the greatest threat, for they neither fully follow the path of reasoned thought, or wholly devote themselves to a religion, simply 'cherry-picking' the bits that fit in with their modern world existance, whilst ignoring the sections they find uncomfortable to deal with.
How arrogant of these people to on the one hand, declare the Bible, or Koran to be the written word of an all-powerful being, then proceed to second guess this God with their own interpretations of his words?

So, to Active Atheism.
If you do not accept that it is just and fair to have YOUR lives directed or influenced by ill-considered belief or blind faith, stop it from happening. Ask your prospective candidates for elections if they have religious beliefs, and explain to them that your non-belief is as important to you.
Ensure that the schools to which you send your children do not continue to indoctrinate them with falsehoods alongside the facts that they learn about the world around them.
Stop going to church if you do not believe, just for the sake of not offending those around you. You may be suprised to find many of them also have no faith, just a desire to not 'rock the boat'.

It is time to be heard. It is time say goodbye to imaginary friends. It is time to raise the human race above the worship of myths and false Gods. It is our time.

ntl: Tossers Once Again Shocker...

I'd just like to take the opportunity to advise anyone out there lucky enough to not be using the services of ntl: to not ever do so on pain of death. I'd once more also like to wish pain, death and immense suffering upon all directors of ntl: and their entire families, for eternity.

I won't bother boring you with the details again, they are tossers.

The Cost Of Living...

From BBC News
Watchdog 'to reject cancer drug'

Bone cancer patients in England are expected to be denied a life-extending drug, which is available in Scotland.
Patients and health charities have condemned the proposals by the National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence.
Velcade slows the advance of myeloma - cancer of bone marrow plasma cells.
Around 4,000 people are diagnosed with myeloma in the UK each year.
A trial last year showed Velcade could extend the life expectancy of a patient by an average of six months more than standard treatment. Treatment costs about £18,000 per patient.
The drug was approved for use in Scotland in 1994, where it is thought to be used as a last resort.
The Daily Mail says it has seen a leaked ruling, which says the drug is more clinically effective than chemotherapy but is not regarded as "cost effective".

My first instinct is, that if I had the chance of dying from bone cancer today, or spending another six months on this earth with the people I love, I would certainly consider it to be 'cost effective'.

The usual argument rolled out in these type of cases is the old chestnut of 'other treatments/patients suffering' if funds are spent on the expensive drug in question. This is a completely spurious argument. The bottom line is, this is all about the bottom line.
Actual production costs of pretty much any drug, (once it's been researched which is an expensive process) are very low. These high costs that get quoted are about drugs companies, some of the richest organisations on the planet, milking all the cash they can back on a newly discovered product, as close to the point of discovery as possible. They invariably make a profit in the long term.
If they spent more time thinking of the long game, instead of wanting to grab cash back as soon as possible, perhaps someone might get to spend a little longer with their child, or a few precious moments more with the one they love.

And you can't put a price on that.

Things That Just Dont Work No 161...

Trying to move things a specific distance with any body part other than your hand because you're too bloody lazy to get up/bend over as required.

Say Yes To Intolerance...

The British press can't stop going on about veils at the moment. Lot's of missed opportunities for some lovely pun headlines in my opinion, "Masking The Truth" "To No a-Veil" etc etc, come on tabloids, you're slipping.

As I've already had my dig at Christianity this weekend, in the name of equality, I thought I'd take the time to slip in a little go at Islam. (Before Hindus, Jews, Satanists and Manchester United fans start complaining, there's plenty wrong with you lot too, just give me time...)

We can dress up debates about the wearing of a veil as an issue about communication, good manners, or a politicians attempt to stir discussion, but what this really comes down to is discrimination. Any religion that treats women the way Islam does can have no place in modern society.
(But then, frankly, I'm yet to find a religion that does deserve a place in modern society).

For those Muslim Radicals out there (the 'angry young men' who chose Islam, where some angry young men choose football hooliganism or gangs), who want to see Islamic law in the UK, it will never happen guys. We're still trying to get one lot of God-Botherers out of the political system, we're certainly not about to let another lot take over when we finally do.

Isn't it time we stopped talking about Tolerance of Religion, and stopped tolerating any of them? Because they are ALL intolerant!
It infringes on my civil liberties to have people who still talk to 'imaginary friends' running the country I live in. My taxes go towards funding schools that perpetuate these myths, teaching children the fantasy of God or Allah or Jehovah alongside the facts of mathematics and science.

We've tolerated religion being used to abuse the Human race for long enough.

The Church of England, The New Tories...

From The Daily Telegraph Wednesday 11th October
Church backs legal rights for parents who live in sin
By Jonathan Petre Religion Correspondent
THE Church of England yesterday backed proposals to give millions of unmarried couples who are "living in sin" similar legal rights to their married counterparts.
Risking accusations that it was undermining marriage, the Church said that cohabiting couples with children should be granted significant legal protection if they split up.
It also argued that those rights should be extended to unmarried couples without children if one of the ex-partners was at risk of suffering a substantial injustice when they separated.
Responding to recommendations from the Law Commission, the Church said it wanted to uphold the ideal of marriage but that there was a strong biblical precedent for protecting the vulnerable.

In time honoured fashion, the Church of England falls over itself again as it tries to desperately reduce those dwindling numbers. Yet another of it's little rules falls by the wayside, as it desperately tries to be all things to all men, women and anyone else who'll join up.

Of course some will say this is simply a case of the church moving with the times, it's a touchy-feely exercise in protecting the less fortunate, which of course in essence it is.
Nonetheless, it's also another good old fashioned turnaround on another of those 'rules for life' that the church have decided doesn't fit with life in the 21st century. Opinions on homosexuality and pre-marital sex may be the big ones, but Christianity of all flavours has a long history of chipping away at the rules it once wrote in stone for it's followers.

This gradual erosion was always one of the fundamental elements that contributed in my childhood to realising what a load of old tosh the whole 'God' thing was. When you first get introduced to it, it's like this great big club, in which the rules and beliefs of the members seem fairly clear.
But you very quickly realise that it's the local branch managers making the rules, and changing them to suit the little world they inhabit at any given moment. So it soon became clear no-one really believed all this rubbish, everybody just took on board what they thought was relevant to them, and paid lip service to the rest.
Because if the really had total faith, and truly believed, then they wouldn't dare have the audacity to re-interpret the rules would they?
So you end up with not a 'belief' system, but an organisation prepared to say whatever people want to hear in an effort to win back support.

Which brings us to the Tory party.....

Mickey Mouse Is A Bastard....

Just in case you we're unaware, the Disney company is still involved in child labour, so next time you see those cute little kids in a Disney shop, having lots of fun, remember the goods are often produced by kids somewhere who will have no childhood.

Here's a link for a little more info, but you've got the internet, get out there, surf, and find out more. This sort of shit is everywhere, but you can make a difference.....go on, do a google search, look some stuff up, you're not doing anything more important right now....
http://www.anomalies-unlimited.com/Disney/Labor.html

The Official Line......

From BBC News
Crystal meth may be reclassified

Methamphetamine is also known as crystal methCrystal Methamphetamine may be reclassified as a Class A drug under new rulings expected to be announced.
It comes as the latest drug survey figures - which show an increased use of certain substances but overall drug abuse falling - are published.
Crystal Methamphetamine is a highly addictive drug which can lead its users into a destructive lifestyle. Reclassification from Class B could lead to an unlimited fine or up to seven years in jail for users.

The survey, he said, is expected to show a drop in the number of people using cannabis.
The government is also expected to say it plans to stick to the classification of drugs into A, B and C classes in response to a parliamentary committee report saying the system was not fit for purpose
In July, a committee of MPs said the designation of drugs in classes A, B and C should be replaced with one more closely reflecting the harm they cause.
The Science Select Committee said the present system was based on historical assumptions, not scientific assessment. Some of the drugs could be rated less harmful than tobacco or alcohol.
The chief executive of the charity Drugscope, Martin Barnes, said there were problems with the classification system and called for debate on the issue.

As usual our glorious leaders will of course take little notice of any recommendations, reports or even their own personal knowledge when it comes to the drugs issue.

The only thing that ever motivates most politicians on this issue, is their own desperation to avoid being branded as 'soft' on drug issues, and their over-powering need to be seen to agree with the vocal anti-drugs brigade. Of course most of the anti-drugs lobby consists predominantly of people who have never had any exposure to illegal drugs whatever, so know absolutely fuck-all about them!

I'd love to know how many thousands of lines of charlie have been racked up in the Houses of Parliament toilets over the years. Or how many of those late night sessions were amphetamine fuelled. How many of our glorious leaders like to unwind with a fat spliff at the end of a hard days debating?

This whole issue is wrapped up in huge blankets of hypocrisy, accompanied by the usual unhealthy dose of nanny-state attitudes this country loves. While millions slowly kill themselves and others every day due to alcohol abuse, simply using coke, weed, speed, and many others could land you in jail, (you know, those places that are so over-crowded they're having to start using police cells to supplement them again this week).

Latest wisdom dictates that to polish one's 'public' image as a politician these days, it's the fashion to feel sorry for the poor user, individuals trapped in an evil cycle of abuse and desolation who steal from their own mothers for their habit. This allows one to demonise the evil 'dealer' for spreading his cruel and vicious poison across our fine otherwise clean nation.

What utter bollocks. Most 'dealers' are good mates of their 'clients' who've simply been the one in the social circle who's been most convenient to sort out that weekends substances. But they are the new target of politicians these days, the purveyors of misery, who supposedly hang about outside school gates drawing five year olds into crack dens with the promise of pyscedelic adventures. (I'm surprised there's room on the pavement outside the school actually, what with the thousands of peadophiles congregating there, piled on top of 4x4 drivers of course).

Here is the news: Drugs are not "BAD" , they are just drugs. People do them because they like them. Yes, some people go too far, lose control, generally fuck up. People do that perfectly well sometimes without drugs, and always have.

How about we suspend all penalties for drug use & supply, until the houses of parliament undergoes an across the board series of drug tests, with no advanced warning. Once we have the results, if a substantial number of our 'betters' test positive, perhaps they'll drop all this bullshit once and for all and get back to spending our money on something worthwhile.

Bloggers Block...

I've been pulling my hair out trying to think of something to write.

I know I don't have to write anything. But I feel I should.

I've had a busy week. In less than 24 hours, I'll be up to my ears in clubbers, loud Trance tunes, dodgy shirts, smiley happy people, and the usual problems and pleasures that go along with running a club night in London.
Right after that, no matter how the party goes, there will be about two days of 'crack-on' where a core group of us, promoters, helpers, DJs, mates, the odd 'random' newbie, will party on through the weekend. Our numbers will gradually deplete as the weekend progresses, 'light-weights' will drop out, people with 'proper' jobs to go to on monday will go home, those with commitments in life other than the pursuit of pleasure will drift away steadily.
By around sunday night, just a handful will be left, and another great clubbing weekend will be consigned to our fragile, soon to be confused memories.

All this means that it's unlikely I'll be writing much over the next few days, and explains why I've had little time to write much this week. I've been somewhat distracted.

But in this lull,
DUCK! INCOMING CLICHE..
In this calm before the storm, for some reason, I feel I ought to be making up for my lack of blogging this week, and the coming absence over the next few days.

Of course, like having a pee before going on a long car journey, the fact that you know you won't be able to do it for ages, in no way helps you to do it now. In a way, it actually seems to make it more difficult.

There are lots of issues in the world today upon which I currently have opinions, at varying levels of wisdom, ranging from 'reasonably informed' to 'complete ignorance' but after three false starts, I've decided not to subject you to them. At least not for the moment.

Consequently, this leaves you, the poor reader, to fulfill a role similar to a guy in a club who's found himself sitting next to a cyberkid pilled off of his nut, who rambles on with the direction and focus of a five year old with an attention disorder.

So if you've dropped in today, hoping to gain a startling insight into world issues of any kind, you're out of luck.

If however, you've dropped in because you simply enjoy reading me ramble on in no particular direction, then you've not been disappointed.

Thank You Boris....

From BBC News

Boris Johnson has taken a swipe at Jamie Oliver's school dinners campaign saying the pressure on children to eat healthy food is "too much".
Tory leader David Cameron this week heaped praise on Mr Oliver's crusade to make school dinners more nutritious.
But Mr Johnson criticised the campaign and stood up for mothers who helped their children avoid healthier options.
"I say let people eat what they like. Why shouldn't they push pies through the railings?," said Mr Johnson.
The father-of-four, who is an official Conservative spokesman on education, added: "I would ban sweets from school - but this pressure to bring in healthy food is too much."

I'd like to thank Boris for his support of pikeys who want to feed their fat little butterball kids whatever they like, thus continuing the existence of a breed of lesser human beings, with little ability to move, even less ability to think and more later life health problems than the NHS could possibly ever cope with.
Without his ridiculous statements of support for these pie pushing sub-humans, we might actually start to believe that the Tory party represents a genuine potential opposition stand-point, rather than the "we'll say anything to get into power" manifesto that they truly have.

Tony and his chums may have been treading on themselves to drag the country away from the political left over the last few years, but lets not forget what an un-caring bunch of bastards were running this country before them.

Equal Rights.....For Some.....

So, on the 1st of October, the UK government brought in new legislation to make discrimination by employers on the basis of age illegal. This was done to combat the fact that the population is getting older, and people simply want to work longer, rather than be forced to retire at 65 and live out a very long retirement with little cash and only boredom on the menu.

The problem is, government legislation on minimum wages still discriminates on the basis of age. If you're under eighteen, it's perfectly legal apparently to still pay you less than if you were over eighteen, regardless of your ability to do the job. The same is true at the age of twenty one.

There is talk that the new legislation may lead to challenges to the legality of the minimum wage rules. I hope so, because frankly, crowing about your wonderful new moves to make everyone even more equal is somewhat hollow when there is still legislation on the books that encourages employers to penalize people based on when they were born.

The Horror Of Cluster Bombs.....

It wasn't until I saw a report on last night's tv news, that I had any awareness of cluster bombs and the horror that they bring to human lives.
This particularly unpleasant piece of military hardware falls haphazardly from planes overhead, scatters into hundreds of smaller 'bomblets', before hitting the ground and each exploding into thousands of tiny shards of high velocity, white hot chunks of metal.

The fact that these explosive pieces of shrapnel can fly through flesh and bone indiscriminately, causing injury and death to all around them is in-human enough.

But it gets worse. These little beauties have a 40% 'fail rate'. So once they've been dropped, 40% of them just sit on the ground, waiting to flay the flesh from anyone who happens to pass by at any moment, or who might accidently disturb them. More often than not, this will be civilians. In farming and rural communities, it is particularly dangerous, as the bomblets sit among crops, just waiting to deliver their deadly message, long after the original, (supposed) target has moved on. This side effect is well known and documented in military circles.

Knowing this, Israel dropped thousands of these little bastards on Lebanon during the recent 'conflict'. And 90% of the ones they dropped were dropped in the last 72 hours of the conflict. When cessation of hostilities was well under way.

The UN currently has over 100 mine clearing experts working the area. There are reports of at least one child having set one off already this week. Many farmers are unable to harvest crops whilst clearing takes place.

Could Israel do any more to earn the reputation as one of the nastiest bunches of bastards on the planet?

Trust Me, I'm A Celebrity....

From BBC News

Two-time Oscar-winner Tom Hanks is the most trusted celebrity in America, according to business magazine Forbes.

Isn't it amazing the way members of the general public can suspend their powers of common sense so far as to assign attributes, personality traits, skills, even feelings, to people they've never met, or often, even seen doing anything other than playing a made up character?

It just goes to prove that you don't actually need to be anything in life, you just need to be good at pretending to be something. Or as we used to say.....

"Bullshit Baffles Brains"

New Friends For Old....

From BBC News

The European Commission has announced that Romania and Bulgaria will be admitted to the EU in January 2007, but under strict conditions.
Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso said both countries had made enough progress to join the union.

So we will be inundated with a stream of low-cost foreign workers, disrupting local economies, creating yet more cultural tensions, shifting Eastern Europes problems into our laps.

It's not that I have an issue with immigration per-se. But why are we opening the doors to more and more people who share no language, culture or history with us, when we have a massive Commonwealth full of individuals with deep social and cultural bonds that find it harder and harder to get into the UK?

Just how ridiculous is it that people from Australia, New Zealand, Canada, Kenya, Nepal, India, South Africa and many other countries all have deeply woven cultural and historical links with us, yet it becomes harder and harder for their citizens to come to our country to live and work without restriction. Some of them still have the Union Jack on their flag for crying out loud!!

The people of the commonwealth have served this nation well, often giving their lives, in numerous conflicts, for many many years. Yet they are considered less deserving of a life in our country than people who have no connection to us what so ever.

I have long been a supporter of this country's involvement in the EU. But going that extra mile for new friends is serious folly, if it is at the expensive of long standing ones.

Stop The War Demo...

No, please, stop the war demo. It's time we marched against these annoying gatherings and put a stop to them.
Ok, perhaps I'm just a little jealous. You see, I've been unfortunate. I've never gone through that "young western world citizen" rite of passage that is going on an 'anti-war' demo.

There is actually a very good reason for this. Despite the fact that I'm not what you'd call a supporter of war. I do accept that sometimes, it happens. And frankly, we've not yet been involved in one that I didn't think was necessary. I went on the odd anti-Nazi stroll as a teenager, little skirmishes with skinhead National Front supporters, that sort of thing. But we were all on the same team if a 'proper' war broke out.

There's a change these days, professional protesters, out waving banners at the drop of a political agenda, fill the streets, backed by Chelsea tractors full of young mums eager to support the cause put forward by their favourite daytime tv presenter. All good for the political health of the nation I'm sure. Just try getting most of them off their backsides on polling day though.

Perhaps I'm just put off by the type of protester I saw being interviewed on the BBC news half an hour ago. A middle aged banner waving Liverpudlian, telling the news reporter in no uncertain terms how Tony Blair was personally responsible for the death of 250'000 human beings because of the wars he'd dragged us into.

It's fuckwits like that, with no sense of reality, or scale, who let their entire political stance be moulded by headlines without reading the stories, that put me off.
People who look at the pictures, but can't be bothered to read the words.
Street corner 'soundbite politicians' with only the tiniest veneer of factual content to cover their otherwise butt-naked, naive, ill-considered political opinions.

Perhaps is to avoid those type of people that I've never been on an anti-war march.

Now if they had an "Anti-War On Drugs" march............

Pic Of The Day...

Warwick Castle, coolest looking castle in England, gotta love those crenellations!

Not So "PC" for potential PCs....

From the bbc news channel....
"Force admits rejecting white men
Gloucestershire police force has admitted illegally rejecting 108 job applicants because they were white men.
The Police Federation said the force has been trying to recruit more female officers and more people from ethnic minorities to meet a government target.
But one of the unsuccessful applicants, Matt Powell took legal action and has been awarded £2,500 by a tribunal.
Mr Powell, 30, said he became suspicious when he was told he had been "randomly deselected".
No response
"I couldn't get 'randomly deselected' out of my head so I made some enquiries," he said.
"I wrote letters, spoke to them and they were coming back with nothing, absolutely nothing.
"They were refusing to talk to me, so I thought, well if you're not going to talk to me you'll talk to somebody, so that's when I got my MP involved and then my solicitor involved and that's when they started to talk."
The case comes six months after Avon and Somerset Police admitted it had illegally rejected almost 200 applications from white men for the same reason. "

So once more our fine boys in blue give members of the public yet another reason to distrust them. After years of endemic racism, and totally alienating much of the non-white population through the seventies and eighties, what do we end up with after 20 years of trying to change things? Racism from the top down.

The discovery of racism in the ranks these days is usually (quite rightly) dealt with swiftly. The officers responsible hardly have time to draw breath before they are put before the courts, dragged over the front pages and cashiered out.

But when someone gives an order (and someone must have, I find it hard to believe a whole bunch of recruiters started acting on their own initiative in unison) that people should be rejected because of skin colour, how many are being disciplined? How many are being dragged through the papers, into court, out of the force? None that I can see.

Some may argue that the attempt to increase the number of ethnic minorities in the force is essential enough that sometimes 'Positive discrimination' is needed. I submit there is no such thing, discrimination always has negative results.
The law is not vague about this. It does not only recognise racism against black skin. So what gives some 'Dudley DoRight' the remit to start trying to convince us it's sometimes ok to make decisions on peoples futures based on race? Not a very 'PC' attitude is it?

Pic Of The Day....

Berlin a few years back. What we liked to refer to as "The Album Cover Shot".

Sublime To The Ridiculous Aussie Style...

Seeing a little of the memorial service for Aussie animal 'bloke' Steve Irwin, I couldn't help but be in awe of the amazing juxtaposition of the situation.

On the one hand we had the incredibly moving experience of watching his young daughter Bindi read a tribute to her dad, beautifully done by a brave little girl at a very tough time in her life.

On the other hand, the sight of a bunch of guys dressed in Irwin-esque safari suits laying out wreaths of flowers to spell the word "CRIKEY", quite possibly the biggest demonstration of tackiness and bad taste so far witnessed on the planet. Only in Australia.

Good News....

I'm in quite a good mood.
I have just, to some degree at least, once again become gainfully employed.
I've just healed a rift with a good mate.
Plans for the Knowwhere party on the 6th are going well.
I'm in good health once again, as I can finally move my neck after four days of walking around like Herman Munster.
And we've just completed a little 'revamp the living room' project, and saved a bucket load on the cost by using the taxman's worst nightmare, Ebay, to do most of it.

File today in the "Plus" box I think.

Pic Of The Day....

One of my favourite shots from one (I forget which) of my trips to NYC. Still up there in my 'Three Favourite Cities In The World' list, along with London and Amsterdam, and just edging out Paris.

On This Day In History....

Today marks the 36th anniversary of the death of Jimmy Hendrix. Not only could he play a mean guitar, he was one of us.
One of the few.

One of that great creative minority that the rest of you out there should be very grateful for and more respectful to.

He was Left Handed. Far and away the best minorty group to be a member of.

For God's Sake Don't Quote Me Pt II....

So the Pope apologizes, Egyptian Opposition group The Musilm Brotherhood initially accepts the apology as genuine, then later decides it's not enough after all. Do you get the impression someone's looking to pick a fight?

Pic Of The Day....

Time for some more self-indulgence. One of my favourite pics, but then it is of the most gorgeous creature on the planet, my (much) better half:-)

For God's Sake Don't Quote Me....

Ok, now I never ever thought in a million years I thought I'd find myself coming to the defence of the Pope. I'll save my thoughts on the Catholic church's 'contribution' to civilization for another time.
But when a public figure, makes a speech, fully aware that it is being recorded by tv cameras, and quite clearly starts a sentence with the phrase "And I Quote...", I think it's a bit much for a whole bunch other religous fanatics to then start taking the quoted words as his own.

I think it's a bit much, but sadly I'm entirely un-suprised.

If there's one thing about (all) religion and the misguided individuals who allow it into their lives, it's the fact that it does tend to make people hear what they want to hear and disregard the rest.

So some Muslims took what the Pope said to indicate that he felt Islam was a violent faith, (which wasn't actually what he said at all) and reacted to this by burning effigies and waving their arms about....violently.

Just Imagine, a world without religion...... didn't some bloke from Liverpool say something about that once?

Pic Of The Day...

A nice little pic of the Melbourne night sky from a couple of years ago, coz I think it's pretty:)

Stop Press: Colonies Revolting.....

Today in history, marks the anniversary of the drawing up of the US Constitution. I’d like to take the opportunity to say well done young’un. I hope you’re doing ok over there without us?

This might be a good chance to point out a slight error is US calendars that may have been over-looked however. For some reason you’ve gone and put down 4th July 1776 as Independence day, when in fact it wasn’t until 3rd Sept 1783 that the treaty of Paris was signed and you actually gained independence.

Just because the kid stamps his feet and says he’s leaving home, doesn’t mean he’s independent until he’s actually out the door. ;-)

Pic Of The Day....

Ok, I know I failed to deliver yesterday, but I woke up virtually unable to move due to a screwed up neck muscle. This morning I've been pulled about by a bone-cruncher, and I can once again move to the keyboard so....

One from the stage at the last Knowwhere, just to give my ego as much massaging as my back had this morning;)

Stevie Stopped By War On Terror....

Yes, the international crackdown on terror and those who use it as their stock-in-trade has finally clamped down on my underhand lifestyle. That fine institution Paypal is currently stopping me from paying for a rather cool rug, because I've been a bit too successful in selling odds & sods over the last few months.

Therefore, in an attempt to crack down on Gun Runners, Terrorists, Drug Smugglers & Money Launderers, I can't use the account until a few more checks have been run. (Checks that involve buggering about and, you've guessed it, paying a bit more cash to them of course!)

Good to see they're doing their bit to protect us here in the free world, though I'm still intrigued to know how someone selling a few old Dungeons&Dragons books, some toy soldiers and an unwanted futon is going to be enough for Osama or the Cosa Nostra to be interested in using me as a front.

Pic Of The Day....

Today's pic is Paris, taken in mid 2005. I've messed with the colours a bit obviously but still one of my favourites.

Simple Pleasures & Perfect Moments...

I've just been out on the doorstep. Just before midnight, a big old lightning storm putting on a free show better than any firework display could ever manage. A cup of black coffee in one hand, a splif in the other. Great big globby raindrops plopping onto my tourist trap Aussie bush hat as I stand next to the love of my life. Just taking it all in.

Life is good.

The Cheapening Of Heroism...

Some topics I just know are going to piss some people off before I even start to write about them. It's particularly bad when I know people are going to get pissed off for the wrong reason.

This is one of those topics. In an effort to avoid the above, please accept from the start, this is NOT about the heroism of the people who lost their lives in the incident I'm about to refer to, but the media's use of heroism as a tool.

Recently a number of people serving in Afghanistan were flown home after losing their lives in an horrific helicopter crash. It was the largest 'single incident' loss of life of military personnel for UK forces since the Falklands war.

The crash was nothing whatever to do with enemy action. So why is it that when such an incident occurs, one would think we are witnessing the return home of mighty heroes slain in pursuit of some lofty freedom or other from the way the media presents it?

Yes, these people would not have been in Afghanistan were it not for military reasons, but if someone had died choking on a chicken bone in the mess hut would that also be treated with the same level of drama?

People who die in crashes or any other circumstances are not heroes simply because they died. It cheapens the word when there are plenty of people in the world who still deserve to have it applied to them.

And Mum Does Not Always Know Best......

The incident gave some TV stations the chance to roll out a mother of a serving paratrooper, recently shot in the conflict (the paratrooper, not his mother). She gladly gave us her opinions on why our boys should come home and the fact that no-one knows why our boys are still there being shot at.

I really fail to see the link between the two stories, other than a chance for a TV station to inject a little 'political comment' of it's own making.

We live in a country where joining the military is done with complete freedom of choice. Part of serving in the military means acceptance of the fact that you go where you are told, and do what you are told. I for one would not want an army protecting me, in which any given trooper decided to hang up his rifle and go home because he didn't fancy being in this particular fight. That Para has a tough job to do. It's the job he accepted when he signed on. It's the job we paid him for, regardless of his political opinions.
Or those of his mum.

Pic Of The Day....

As promised earlier, a "Pic Of The Day" spot.

Brighton again, not sure if this one was taken on the same trip. It shows the burned out ruin of the West Pier. Not the luckiest building in the world. It burned beyond use once, then some time later, before it had been repaired, caught fire once again and was almost completely destroyed.

Pete Doherty Life A Shambles...

I've just been sadly reminded of the existence of Pete Doherty by receiving a spam email advertising the release of an album by himself and his hangers on, Babyshambles entitled "Back to the Bus".

What a complete waste of fresh air this bloke is. He stumbles through life being an irritating little twat, feeding the media's frenzy for anyone with a 'drug problem' and generally making a prick of himself, much to the delight of angsty teenagers who want to model their pathetic lives on a pathetic anti-hero.
It truly is depressing, that 'celebrity' is so cheap. It's not like he even makes good drug choices. The twat doesn't pick the ones that lots of people chose to do recreationally without screwing up their day to day lives, but insists on doing heroin, a substance that helps along the Darwin theory by eliminating a number of the human races less useful members.

Sadly, his story will end one of two ways:

A heavily publicized series of rehab sessions, followed by a 'welcome back to the world' frenzy, which allows him to once again pursue his talentless musical career.

Or a 'Hendrix/Cobain' ending in which thousands of screwed up teens will forevermore see him as the greatest influence on their lives, and lots of music journo's will try to tell us that the shite he produces is in fact the most important music of our time.

Kate Moss really must have had the Coke/Beer goggles on the night she met him.

Look At This...

Just spotted this image in a folder and thought I'd put it on here as it pleases me to do so:)
Hey, I might even start a "Pic Of The Day" spot...

Review... 10 Years Late....

I can't believe I've not seen it until now, but last night I sat down and watched LA Confidential for the very first time. What a bloody awesome movie! I should be ashamed to call myself a movie fan I know, taking 10 years to get round to seeing it, but hey, I've been busy. All the performances are excellent, but pale into insignificance next to the incredible storyline. A truly great piece of script-writing in my opinion from Brian Helgeland & Curtis Hanson (who also directs). I've got to get my hands on the novel by James Ellroy now to see if it lives up to the old test of novels always turning out to be even better than the movies.

One thing, did Russell Crowe base his off-screen persona on this particular on-screen performance forever after or is it just me?

Gangster or Gangsta.....

I've had a bit of time on my hands today, (well, technically, I had things to do but was able to have movies on in the background), so I had a bit of a 'Gangster' day. I watched "Goodfella's" followed by "Casino". Both are bloody good movies, ok, they're a bit violent, and they are both 'based' upon real characters (with traditional hollywood style & good looks added for effect).

I've always loved a good gangster movie, the appeal of the 'good' badguy, the toughguy image, extremely cool suits (not sure about those Hawaiian shirts when they get older, but hey, "Wata ya gonna do?") Gangster movies have always been great entertainment for the boys. I don't know many blokes who don't think they're cool, and who don't secretly fancy themselves as a bit of a Gangster as they watch these movies, especially with the advent of in recent years our own uber-cool brit-gangster movies such as "Lock-Stock " & "Layer Cake".

So what is the difference between me, (and the thousands of blokes like me in the UK) who think these things are cool, but accept them as artistic/entertaining representations of what would, in reality be a very un-pleasant way of life, .....and these morons running around the street of Moss Side in Manchester this weekend?

Why do some young men seem to be unable to understand that Manchester is not "The 'hood" Birmingham is not anyone's "turf", London is not the OK fucking Corrall!

Because someone, somewhere failed to explain the difference to these young men at some point, yet another young boy is dead.

Everyone is aware of the fact that Jesse James, the boy who died, shared his name with another, more infamous character. By all reports the kid was not involved in gangs himself. He also shared the name with the son of Jimmy Conway, (Robert DeNiro's character in Goodfellas) who thought it was 'cool' to name his sons after the James Brothers of the old west.

It's time some parents took a little more time to teach their teenage boys where reality starts and the movies end, then perhaps there will be a few less who have to suffer the way young Jesse's mum is doing right now.

The Great Thing About Blogging Pt III

Yet again I'd like to dedicate a small piece of my time to the useless pricks that are NTL.

As my TV service seems to be a bit screwed up right now, I thought I'd call customer service and try to get it sorted out.

They don't take calls after 4pm on sunday. (Although they are still happy to charge me for using the service after 4pm on sunday). So silly me thought I'd simply drop them an email, hey, it's not life or death after all, but they may be able to sort the problem for me right?
Wrong.
Go to their home page, follow the links to contact them, and the clever people at NTL have engineered things so that if you're an existing customer, and you click the buttons relating to tv problems, it sends you to a page that gives you the customer service phone number (remember that? The one they don't answer after 4pm on sundays?). What the page does not give you is.....
AN EMAIL ADDRESS!!!

NTL, you truly are a bunch of souless wankers who still don't give a shit about their customers. I'd go so far as to say that anyone who allows themselves to be a member of your companies' board or management deserves to die drowning in their own excrement.

There should be a law that allows us to hunt them through the streets beating them with a fistful of old NTL television cables.

Their children should be taken from them at birth, is case the poor little innocents are corrupted by the souless scum that are their parents.

If Al Qeda decided to start targeting NTL, shit, I think I'd even consider changing religion.

....and relax.

On This Day In History....

Today in 1976 saw the death of: Mao Zedong,
Political Leader of Communist China.
Born: 26 December 1893
Birthplace: XiangTan, Hunan Province, China
Best Known As: Founder of the People's Republic of China & wearer of particularly style-less suits.
A victim of severe Male Pattern Baldness Chairman Mao was almost single-handedly responsible for the removal of the neck-tie from Chinese fashion.

As The Fifth Anniversary Draws Near...

I'm sitting here wondering about how the events of 11th September 2001, and the reactions of our western governments that followed, have influenced the world in the long term.

There are some direct personal changes for me, but frankly very few.

Flying has become progressively more of a pain in the butt in the intervening years.

I've developed an overpoweringly strong dislike of religious fundamentalists of any persuasion.

But if I'm honest, the direct effects on my life have been virtually nil.

I also have a sneaking suspicion that the same is true for the vast majority of the population of the planet. It's like when a natural disaster hits a part of the world other than your own. While the pictures are freshly broadcast, you feel the horror, the despair, the collective pain of humanity as another bunch of faceless statistics are added to the casualty figures, but in real terms, the direct influence it has on your own life is often no more than if you had just watched a movie and the tormented faces were those of actors living out a script.

For many, 9/11, as the Americans like to call it (and it was predominantly their disaster after all) will never be out of their minds.
Lots of people will have lost a loved one.
Many more lost someone they knew, or cared about just a little, and even more knew someone who lost a 'friend' or colleague. Such is the nature of levels of grief after death. It spreads out in progressively less harmful waves until it's final ripple is the billions of us who only ever saw events on TV or in the newspapers. Many of us myself included if I'm honest, had reached a point when "I've heard too much about this now", was the thought going through our minds as the news agencies pump out the stories of remembrance.

So perhaps those of us in the big ripple should take just a little time to think about it and remember. It wasn't a TV movie. It doesn't matter whether you think it was a US Government conspiracy that caused it, or it simply happened exactly as it looked on the news and we've been told the whole truth. What really matters is, people really died.
Lots of them.
So give them a moments thought.

Congratulations....

I've just heard that two very good friends of mine have brought a new life into the world today, and in spite of my image as a cynical old sort, the news has made me extremely happy and smiley:)

Well done to you both, I wish all three of you everything you wish for yourselves.

Happy Birthday little fella, welcome to the world.

Talent Crossover....

Now don't get me wrong. There are some out there for whom fortune has smiled, and they can turn their hands to just about anything. Ian Botham, cricketer, half decent on the footie field, Billy Connolly, top comedian, can act a bit, to name just a couple, but who are these fuckwit little agents who constantly tell 'celebrities' that they are talented enough to cross over into other genres? Why did the whole cast of neighbours throughout the eighties and nineties believe they could sing for example? Why do so many comedians insist on delivering a painfully badly sung favourite at the end of an otherwise entertaining night of laughter, with a ludicrously serious look in their eyes?

And why does celebrity welsh-chav Charlotte Church (right) think that she's talented enough to present us with the imaginatively titled "The Charlotte Church Show" last night on TV? She can sing. The girl has a lovely voice, it can't be denied, and the transition from teen classical singer to pop starlet must have been a tough one which she managed to deal with. Can't knock the lass for wanting to stay on top of her game. But who the hell told her she'd be good in a comedy sketch/variety type show? She was dumped into the middle of a script which was entirely reliant on bucket loads of self-mocking welsh jokes, and (cringingly looking like the bits she wrote herself) chavette style snide remarks about other celebrities body shapes. Now when the girl is quite cute, but has got 'future Miss lard -arse of the world' written all over that body shape, she wants to watch who's body she chuckles at. (No, it isn't puppy fat, she ain't twelve anymore.)

Perhaps we should all take a leaf out of the celebrity cross-over phenomenon. Perhaps they're right, we're all incredibly multi-talented, if only we had their courage in exploring our skills. So next time you've got the plumber round fixing a leak, get him to have a bash at cooking you a meal for later. Get your dentist to fix that annoying banging noise from under the bonnet of your car next time you see him, and while the vet's got his hand up the dog's bum, see if he can run you up a nice cocktail dress for this evening.

Goodbye Anonimity...

Since this is the coolest picture ever taken of me, or ever likely to be, I figured it would be an appropriate one to use on here.

Between Thoughts & Dreams...

It's fucking irritating to be gripped by the realisation of one's pointlessness in the big scheme of things. Particularly at 1 o'clock in the morning.
At 1 o'clock in the morning, whilst some things seem clearer, many thoughts disappear into a quagmire of confusion. It's that bloody awful period between waking and sleep, between thoughts and dreams. The issues that crowd your head, your daily life's ups and downs, get all jumbled up with each other. Stir it up with a sleepy brain, the odd drug or two, too much cheese and an already over-active imagination and you end up with a fucking awful mess. Is there any wonder dreams are weird? Often in my dreams, in some way or another I am still back working in a newsagents, or with the people I worked there with. That was ages ago, and it was bloody boring, yet it often pops into my sleeping reality. There's no escaping life's little banalities, even in dreams.

I'm feeling pretty disappointed and let down right now.
Feelings that are always made worse by the fact that you know full well, the only person who really built you up to a much higher expectation of events than was healthy, was of course yourself. You'll blame others of course. That's expected. But it's a real shit, trying to 'not get excited' about something, 'not build one's hopes up' etc. The second that thought enters your head, your hopes are already up, you are too excited.
It was arrogant of me to think that I could do something that would make a difference. I'm well aware of the abilities of the badger to promote arrogance, and his aunt's propensity towards egocentricity. Nonetheless I did, for a short time at least, convince myself that I might be able to perform a role that was for a greater good or a higher purpose, if only in some small way. Obviously allowed myself to be 'fished in' there then. Arse.


Religion...
I think I've just realised why mankind invented religion (other than to control one another) it gives you a way to pretend your life has a purpose on those occasions when you don't know which way to turn. You don't need it during the good times of course, when you're happy, you have drive and focus, or you think you do, and who cares anyway, because you're happy!
When you are not, religion points the way, any way, the direction is not important, so long as it's going somewhere.
So religion is kind of like a map. When you're not lost, you don't need it, stuff it in life's glove compartment and put your foot down. One day when you lose your way, pull it out, scratch your head for a bit, then power on, full of new-found confidence and direction.

The problem I have now is a tough one though.

Since I've realised that the map doesn't actually show me where to go, it's just a placebo, designed to get you going in 'a' direction, it's lost it's motivational power for me.

I reckon I need to start making my own map.

US Government in over-reaction shocker...

A friend of ours arrived from the USA yesterday. Her expensive purfumes, bought as a gift was confiscated in the usual "USA shits it's pants saga" fashion.

She then had the brainwave of sending the offending item by post to the person intended to receive the gift. She was told that once it was in the bin it became US government property and was non-returnable.

The US Government are truly a bunch of ham-fisted morons. It's so nice to see our own government is hell-bent on copying them so closely.

Crikey.....

Steve Irwin, Australian icon and all-around madman was killed by, yes, you guessed it, a dangerous animal.

I actually read one report in which it was described as "extremely unlucky". How is spending 40 years messing about with dangerous animals before your number coming up, unlucky exactly? I'd have thought there are few people who could honestly argue against the fact that he'd had a good run on luck.

I wonder if his final words were... "This fella can be really dangerous..."

Eloi Alert...

Until about an hour ago I didn't have a clue how Pasta was made. For all I knew, it could have grown on trees, been some sort of Italian root vegetable, or been been carved from the rump of some mystical beast. I've just been educated otherwise. Fascinating. Eggs & Flour eh? Who'dve though it....... I'm such an Eloi.

Thought Crime....

Taken From...
/news.bbc.co.uk/

A mother whose daughter died at the hands of a man obsessed with violent internet porn has won her fight for a ban on possessing such images.
The government has announced plans to make the possession of violent porn punishable by three years in jail.
It follows a campaign by Berkshire woman Liz Longhurst whose daughter Jane, a Brighton schoolteacher, was allegedly strangled by Graham Coutts.
Mrs Longhurst's campaign was backed by MPs and a 50,000-signature petition.

So, once again 'thought crime' has reared it's head in our society.
Simply looking at something that others find distasteful is punishable by imprisonment. Again.

Should anyone possessing pictures of the holocaust be tried for war crimes?

Should movie actors be imprisoned for inciting violence by performing fake murders on screen?

The murderer of Jane Longhurst was a lunatic who deserves no pity and frankly, less mercy. But to assume that watching violent pornography was the cause of his lunacy is to assume that anyone who watches 'Schindlers list' is likely to become a Nazi, watchers of 'The Godfather' will become gangsters, or watchers of 'Eastenders' will become barrow-boys.

Most people who view any kind of images or media for their own entertainment, do not then go on to commit crimes based upon it.

Before the advent of tv, the internet, movies, magazines, even books, some people chose to kill, maim, rape, murder,abuse and harm other human beings. Some people always will.

As a knee-jerk reaction, our ever-so clever law-makers have made it a criminal offence to look at images which were in all likelyhood posed by people who chose to do so, were paid to do so, or even possibly enjoyed doing so!
So you can beat the shit out of each other in the privacy of your bedroom, you can even be paid for doing it, but if someone looks at the pictures, they are a criminal.

Welcome to the asylum.

Delivering A Service...

Below is an extract from news.bbc.co.uk



A postman who advised people how to stop junk mail being delivered to their home could lose his job after bosses suspended him for misconduct.
Roger Annies composed and circulated a leaflet about the Royal Mail's opt-out clause for unsolicited mail during his rounds in Barry, south Wales.
Residents are said to be annoyed at their postman's suspension.
A Royal Mail spokeswoman confirmed that a postman employed in Barry was being investigated for "alleged misconduct".

I’d like to take the opportunity to thank Mr Annies, and wish him well over the next few weeks.

Royal Mail is frankly a monkey outfit. Many years of being a profitless ‘jobs for life’ nationalised pig at the taxpayers trough have proven to have taken it’s toll as it tries to drag itself kicking and screaming into the 21st century.

My local post office, (presumably some sort of franchise set-up) has one member of staff out of four that is friendly, and I reckon that’s because I’ve known her for many years prior to her employment there. The rest range from corpse-like indifference to down-right pig ignorance. Customer service is non-existent. They still actually have the lowest staff level during the standard lunch break slot, the time when the majority of their customers want to use the service. Whilst the current delivery man I have is a friendly enough chap, there have been a number of occasions over the last few years when a ‘sorry you weren’t in’ card was quietly slipped through the door as I sat four feet from it, simply because it would save the lazy sod on the other side of the door the trouble of waiting for me to sign if he bothered to knock.

So Roger Annies, well done. A rare individual in a service industry that wants to provide a service. Royal Mail should make him the next MD, they might become a little more popular.

Oops....

Funny how I always seem to be starting blogs with an apology for not having done any blogging for a while!
It must be this hectic fast paced life on the edge that I lead.
Yes it's always all go at 'Stevie Towers', always some sort of deal going down, some sort of project being put together. Why, only yesterday I managed to get some shopping in at the spar, and negotiate myself a tidy little discount by not having the right change on me, and I've recently involved myself into a on-going washing up project on weekdays.

But amidst all this hustle and bustle I still like to set aside time to enjoy myself in life, time to stop and sniff the metaphorical roses as it were. So with this in mind, I took full advantage of the bank holiday weekend just passed, and immersed myself in three days of celebratory shenanigans. It was bloody excellent. I'd like to thank the South African team for the use of their premises, welcome our new Greek branch on to the team and offer thanks to the Swiss office for taking time out from the Insurance and Defence industry to attend a last minute meeting. If all goes according to plan the move out of the tobacco market should turn out to be very lucrative.

Oh well back to the weekday grind.

The Great Thing About Blogging Pt II......

And of course, today, my old favourites when it comes to "corporate toss-pots who couldn't give a monkeys about their customers", stories, NTL, rears it's ever-so ugly head.

I've just had three attempts, three lots of going on hold and two "we're sorry that our lines are busy right now, please call another time" messages., before finally speaking to someone who sorted a very simple problem.

In the spirit of getting someone to take responsibility for the actions of these souless wankers, I'd like to put forward today:

Ms Vanessa Thomas, Head Of Credit Control. NTL Group

Now I never got to speak to Vanessa, if indeed she even exists, but it's your name on the bottom of the letter I was trying to sort out love, so you can take the flak via this lovely public medium. If you don't like that, then move jobs, and don't put your name on the bloody letters.

Sort your telephone systems out you silly cow, how the fuck are we supposed to get through with your ridiculous system?? Get some staff who know what they are talking about, and stop sending incorrect snotty letters to the people who pay for your 4x4 and mortgage while you sit on your fat arse in a plush office. Then, and only then, you might just be working for a company that deserves some respect, and might yourself be worth more than fuck all, which is your current contribution to the human race!

Ahhh. That's Better.

The Great thing About Blogging....

Is the opportunity it affords to vent one's spleen fully and publicly about things that really piss one off.
So it will come as no surprise that that fine old institution that's been the target of mankind's displeasure since they were first invented was going to make an appearance here sooner or later.
Banks.

Or, in this case, more specifically NatWest Bank.
The organizations themselves really are souless un-caring money making machines. Anyone with half a brain is aware of that. It's been a while since any sane human being really thought that any attempt at 'customer service' from these businesses was anything more than window dressing, but that said, they really are useless shits as well.

As well as failing to pay part of our rent on a number of occasions in the last few months, the retards at NatWest this month have just cut my other half's credit limit on her NatWest Credit Card, because they say she's not been paying it regularly enough. This may be due to the fact that the NatWest Direct Debit, from her NatWest Current Account, set up in June to pay her NatWest Credit Card, has still not been set up by the fuckwits at....yes, you guessed it, NatWest.

Now, there is a school of thought that says you can't be rude to those poor unfortunates on the phone employed to deal with these sort of problems, it's not their fault is it? They're only doing a job right? We just don't understand the stress these poor people have to deal with every day do we?

Bollocks.
Because if there's one thing that banks have become really good at in the last few years, it's employing people to bloody stupid to do the job on purpose, thus saving themselves a fortune in actually delivering any customer service as thousands of people hang up the phone, too frustrated to listen to another minute of looped music.

Now this may be good for reducing the unemployment figures amongst the stupid, but it does nothing for the stress levels of those of us frustrated by the ineptitude of their employers.

So, fully aware as I am that this will in no way change the attitude of NatWest or any other banking organization, I'd like to take this opportunity to say, on behalf of all those wronged by you,

NatWest, you truly are a bunch of Wankers.

"It ain't my fault guv..."

We are virtually being crushed in the stampede of individuals and companies trying to avoid any responsibility for anything in the last couple of days, following the messy state of our airports yesterday and today.

Whilst of course it's not possible to hold airline companies, security staff, insurance companies or anyone other than the perpetrators responsible for the general chaos that reigns, they sure are desperate to tell the good old British public to just bend over and take it again it seems.

For example, it is thought that in more than half of cases, your travel insurance that the nice salesman convinced you was essential in these turbulent times, will be of absolutely bugger all use to you. Many constitute "acts of terrorism" as exemptions to payouts, and those that do may argue that as no terrorism actually took place (only the aftermath of chaos left by successfully detecting terrorists), then you are again not entitled to compensation.

So here you are, sat with your rotten teeth (your toothpaste is now contraband), smelly (sorry no deodorant), bored (no books), kids screaming (no toys), soon to be skint (you can still of course buy all these things at vastly inflated prices once on the plane), your holiday screwed as you sit in an airport terminal for hours, still unsure if you're actually going to go anywhere or not, and you can't even look forward to the insurance covering it.

I'm beginning to think this whole thing is a massive conspiracy between the government and English Heritage. Just you watch as the droves of people decide to avoid the perils of foreign holidays altogether from now on, and go and visit that nice stately home in Oxfordshire or Devon instead.
Imagine that, a holiday where you can carry your water with you, no need for a passport or the fat jobsworth behind the counter who decides you look 'suspicious' and keeps you going through your baggage for three hours. The weather's not too bad either.

And best of all, the road signs are in English.

Frenchman and Twin Towers shocker...

On This Day In History...

Frenchman Phillipe Petit took an illegal stroll between the Twin Towers on a tightrope on this day in 1974. "Little Phil" as the boys in the pub used to call him, prepared for six years for the stunt, and was arrested on his return to terra firma.

A spokesman for the US government upon hearing this news today released the following statement: "Well that explains why they fell down so fucking easy, the bloody frenchie must have weakened their infrastructure considerably. We will now be closing the enquiry."

A spokesman for Little Phil denied reports that a follow up stunt involving a wing walk on a jumbo jet in 2001 was anything to do with him.

And So The Cycle Continues....Only Different....

Middle East 1991, Iraq puts it's collective desert boots on, starts up it's tanks and takes an extended holiday in it's smaller less powerful neighbour, Kuwait's back garden.

The great powers of western civilization flock to the poor oppressed Kuwaiti's aid, proving that in the modern age the civilized world will not tolerate naked aggression from nation states seeking to advance themselves through violence.

A couple of SAS chaps manage to make careers out of writing from fucking up a mission, lots of people die, everyone goes home, (except the dead ones).

Middle East 2006. Israel puts it's collective desert boots on, starts up it's tanks and takes an extended holiday in smaller less powerful neighbour, Lebanon's back garden.

The great powers of western civilization flock to the nearest sand dune to hide their heads in it and hope the problem goes away.

It would appear that Israel has successfully managed to add the USA and the UK to the Gaza Strip and the West Bank in lists of places where it gets to make the rules.

Note to Lebanon: When they pull out next time, but before they invade next time after that, don't waste time and money re-building your infrastructure. Put all your efforts into finding lots of oil, set up some heavy duty deals with the USA so that they become reliant on your supply and sit back and enjoy the sunshine. When your noisy neighbour next decides to jump over the fence and punch your face in because your kids threw stones at his greenhouse, watch for the dust of the now motorized 7th cavalry as it comes hastily over the hill to your rescue and gives the bad boy a bloody nose. (They will of course then stick around opening McDonald's restaurants and treading huge amounts of gum into your pavement, but it beats having to pay for your own army).

Note to Israel: Stop acting like the kid in playground who used to get beaten up, took a few self defence classes and now thinks it's ok to kick the shit out of anyone who looks at him sideways as a form of payback for past suffering. Wankers.

Note to the USA: You set yourself up as the world's policeman, get off your fat supersized arses, mount up in your gas guzzling humvees and fucking put a stop to this madness.

Note to the UK: Send in the SAS, those boys need something new to write about and the army pension is shit.

Note to Mainland Europe: Nobody cares what you think, keep out of it.

Note to everyone: The views expressed here do not necessarily represent those of a sane human being. Obviously.

No Really....

I am going to start posting daily. I promise. I told you I would, I promised, so I will.

On This Day In History..

The Enola Gay dropped it's payload, "Little Boy" (otherwise known as a nuclear bomb) on Hiroshima killing 60'000 human beings outright 61 years ago today.

It took the world slightly less time to recover from this, than it did to recover from the trauma left hanging over the heads of thousands of eighties teenagers, when they discovered electra pop style icons 'Orchestral Maneuvers In The Dark' were in fact singing about said nuclear nightmare in their catchy pop tune "Enola Gay", and not an Italian homosexual with an unhealthy obsession with his "Momma being proud of Little Boy today" as indicated in the lyrics.

Though the boys in the band did sport some lovely jumpers as I recall.

This is kids stuff....

If you really want to see blogging, not my lazy amateur attempt at it, then you have to go here.
http://wellclearly.blogspot.com/
Some of you will know the author from days gone by. I still maintain that in spite of the excellent work in his blog, I can still out rant him in a face to face conflict, (though this has usually been because I have a louder voice).

Words of warning, set aside plenty of time, he writes even more than he talks, also some of it is from the perspective of someone living in a less civilized environment, but that's because he is at the moment.

Enjoy the master.

Remembering too much...

Remember that wonderful British spirit? Stiff Upper Lip, getting on with it, knuckling down?

Well it seems judging by today's tv coverage we have lost that get over it/get on with it Britishness that we have every reason to be proud of. You can't turn on the tv today (with the possible exception of the cooking channels) without seeing another long-drawn out 'memorial' special from the lazy arsed journo's that dwell in darkest tv land.

Are we turning into Americans? Only we seem to need to analyse every bloody thing forever and a day, get a few years of therapy under our belts, and set up an enquiry if someone so much as farts in our general direction these days. Now I'm not belittling the pain some people went through a year ago, it must have been horrific. But the majority of them got on with it, regardless of injury or loss, and carried on with life, the way we do.

Except that is for those that the 'journo-voyeurs' got a hold of. In our wonderful 'I'll make ya famous' culture of today, every opportunity to drag another victim before us and tell us of their amazing story of human trauma is taken. These people suffered no more or less than those who went home and got on with life, there's just been a lot more fuss made of it.

Sometimes terrorists injure people, but it takes a journalist to turn them into a victim.

Flaming June Pt II

Well, here we are, June all done bar the shouting. In lots of ways it lived up to my expectations. My 40th was far and away the best 40th party I've ever had. A massive thank you to all you lovely people who came along, and those who couldn't but were there in spirit.

The Wedding went extremely well, the happy couple have now returned to the world, ready to settle back into years of fetching each others slippers, cocoa and buying soft furnishings....ok perhaps not yet.

England, in spite of the best efforts of S.G.E are still in the World Cup.

And of course, being England, weather has alternated between a tropical summer and Icelandic winter in the space of 30 days.

Still my favourite month, oh well, only another 12 months to go......

And Finally a Rant-Free one....

Just a quick note to say goodbye to Princess P. One of our number right since the early days, you're off to pastures new, new beaches, new experiences, new friends. I know it's only Bournemouth, but you know how crap us lot are at going anywhere.

You're one of the best P, we'll all miss you. Hopefully see you in the not too distant future.

Come On England...I Guess

I'm a full blown, dyed in the wool, cross of St George wearing Englishman.

I shall remain so until the day I die, regardless of where I'm living, who my friends are or anything else. So it pains me to say, thank God we will be soon rid of that numpty Swede we currently have performing perverse tactical experiments with our precious football team. Because quite frankly at the moment, it's embarrassing. How on earth we've managed to still be in the competition in spite of his formation ideas, I have no idea. It's simple Sven, 4-4-2, bugger your 'holding' position, bugger your 'one man up front' system. We don't care if 'the players like it'. We don't, it makes us look like we cannot play the game, and it will mean our boys coming home after we play the Portuguese free-style fighting team on Saturday.

On another note on the World Cup, bad luck the Aussies for that bloody appalling penalty decision at the end of their game. Yet another Italian is currently being transferred from their football squad to the Olympic diving team as we speak.

And finally on football, for now anyway...
Sixteen yellow cards, four sendings off. What the bloody hell was that all about??

Cyclists.

I think some of you may have been expecting this one. It's been an old favourite in the Stevie rant collection for some considerable time now, and sooner or later it was going to appear on the blog.

I hate them.
They never seem to get it right.
These days, if you hit one of the inconsiderate, self-satisfied little oiks, you are looked upon with more derision that a carpet-bomber of Kurdistan or a fundamental terrorist.
They pay no bloody road tax (and no, paying it for you car sitting at home on the drive doesn't count, if you have two cars, you pay two lots of tax, why should you be allowed on the road with another vehicle for free?).

When we've gone to the trouble to give them 30% of the pavement, (which is for bloody pedestrians) in the form of a cycle lane, they happily use it, until it reaches a junction, at which point, they immediately adopt their favourite stance, that of some sort of bizarre "diplomatic immunity" that they think they have from the rules of the road. They will then proceed to zip across the road, regardless of traffic light status, or launch into some kind of pavement/road/ crossing combo, ignoring the lights for either vehicle or pedestrian, to the best of their ability.

At least the Dutch use a bell!

If you happen to be the victim of these lunatics and accidentally run them over as they perform their multi-surface combo, you're likely to get put up against a wall and shot.

A sad by-product of these cycle lanes is the fact that they then assume they have divine right to cycle on any bit of bloody pavement they see there-after! No! You are not bloody ten years old and wearing stabilizers, get off the bloody pavement!

For the pavement riding variety of Cyclist I suggest an effective solution. Simply carry a sturdy stick at all times, and should you see one approaching, thrusting it vigorously through their spokes as they pass should sufficiently cure them of their problem.

The other breed of cyclist is an altogether more irritating animal and needs to be dealt with far more aggressively.

The morons that insist on riding on the road two abreast.

No matter the width (or lack thereof) of the road. No matter that a twenty ton lorry is coming the other way and you need to use your side of the road and not just two feet in the middle of it.
Still they insist on riding alongside their fellow moron, perhaps comparing silly tight shorts or water containers, apparently oblivious to the traffic scenario ahead.
Truly the ultimate in bloody stupid selfish individuals, there is only one sensible solution for these people.
Exploding helmets.
Helmets should become obligatory for cyclists.
With the wonders of modern technology, we could simply insert small explosive devices into the helmets, and, should strategically placed sensors at the side of the road indicate that a cyclist has ridden two abreast for any longer than the amount of time required for over-taking, the device is triggered.
Now you can all see the benefit this can bring to mankind. Kind of Darwinism for two-wheeled idiots. But there is another benefit.
If one places the the explosives on the left of the helmet, should it have cause to go off, there's a good possibility it may also take out the OTHER offending rider! Killing two nerds with one stone as it were.

So, come on drivers and pedestrians, lets reclaim our roads and streets from these self satisfied individuals. Pick up your sturdy sticks, write to your MP about exploding helmets, and one day we will once more be able to travel our highways and byways in peace and safety, without fear of seeing anymore dayglo green or yellow unless it's on a council worker.

Okay, Okay....

Alright, so I didn't bother writing anything for some time. I could use the excuse that, due to an incredibly fun-packed and exciting June so far, I simply didn't have the time, but it would be bollocks. I've just been very lazy. Not an un-common trait in me, as most of you will know. Anyway, I'm back, I'm ranting again, so shut up moaning.

Flaming June..

Well, it's finally arrived, the month we've all been waiting for (well I have anyway) Flaming June! There is seemingly no end to the social functions this month, including (but not limited to) The Mighty B & Her Ladyship's wedding, about twenty birthdays (including my own 40th!) The long awaited return of "London's Best Trance Party", and of course the World Cup finals!! I am currently unemployed, and frankly, bloody grateful, how the heck would I possibly fit it all in otherwise??
First of these big events, the wedding, takes place this saturday, so may I wish a marvelous day to all, particularly of course the bride and groom!
June, you gotta love it!!

Cheating.

Right now, England are playing a friendly against Hungary. Lampard has just missed a penalty against Hungary, and in spite of being an avid England fan, I'm glad he missed. The penalty was awarded for a foul on an England player that never happened. Yet again, we witnessed a player faking a foul, just to steal an unfair advantage.

How do we expect the kids of today to learn to respect fairness and fair play if their heroes demonstrate none on live TV? Players should be sent off immediately if they fake a foul. We have the benefit of immediate action replays these days, lets give that benefit to the officials, and allow players to be sent off after they have been viewed for faking it. I hate cheats, and today, an England player has just cheated in front of thousands of people. Then one of the commentators of the the game has the audacity to say "Other people get away with it, why shouldn't we?". The reason we should not get away with it is the old adage..."Two Wrongs Do Not Make A Right."

Get the cheats off of the TV and the sports field, then perhaps we will have less of them in real life.

Getting Away With Murder...

Yes, it's official, you can now get away with murder. Pat Finucane was murdered by the UDA in 1989. His killer, was sent down for the murder in 2004, and told he would spend 22 years in jail. Yesterday he was freed. As a prisoner in the UK he did not qualify for early release under the Good Friday Agreement (that wonderful get out of jail free card for terrorists everywhere!).

So, he was moved to Northern Ireland, then he became eligible.

What the fuck is going on with this country??

We spend half our lives hiding under the covers, dodging terrorist attacks from one source, meanwhile, when we do convict one, we set him free as part of some sort of 'peace' initiative. The troubles in Northern Ireland have plagued this country for many years. But we stood solid against the atrocities, committed in one pathetic religious name or other, because the people who committed these acts were wrong. Now it seems, it's time for the British public to fold. Suddenly we want to reconcile with our own old fanatics, in an effort to focus our attentions on the new demon from the east.

How many years will it be before we are releasing Islamic fundamentalist terrorists, when yet another enemy comes to light?

I've Got One Less Thing..

...to moan about. And I'm glad. I've found out recently that one of my pet hates, the fact that servicemen from the Gurkhas were not permitted to settle in the UK unless they retired after 1997. This is now not the case. About bloody time too! For many years, these brave individuals have stood side by side with British troops in virtually ever theatre of war in which we have been involved. Yet our ungrateful government deemed it more important to give resident rights to any Tom Dick or Stanislav from eastern European countries that have recently joined our little European 'club' than ex-members of the Gurkha regiment.

Good luck to any Nepalese who settle in our country following these rules changes, they are a welcome and long overdue addition to our culture.

Is It Just Me?

Or is 'Blair/Labour baiting' some kind of new blood sport that didn't get banned? Now I can see good and bad in the performance of our glorious leader and his troubled term in office, but, did I see our wonderful media today give poor old Tony a hard time because he didn't know how many illegal immigrants there are in this country?

Now forgive me for being naive, but how the bloody hell could he be expected to know?? Do our friends in the media think that your average illegal immigrant is going to go to the bloody post office and register his or her presence once they have settled into a luxurious lifestyle sponging off of the good old British tax payer?

The longer I live, the more I think that the UK mass media is populated by gossipy old twats who really serve no purpose in life other than to prod at anyone they fancy, just as the mood takes them. They don't actually have a political opinion, they simply want to agitate the 'lynching' gene in their readers/viewers.

What do you do if you see a Lawyer drowning? Throw him a journalist to keep him company.

And Today's No1 is...

If like me you like to occasionally steal some poor soul's work by downloading tunes from the internet, you could do worse than digging around today for "Smokebelch II" by "The Sabres Of Paradise" turn it up, select your mind-altering substance of choice, and simply drift away........Lovely....

Glitter, Visitors & Absent Friends..

Three days without an entry, I'll be drummed out of blogger union, but, what are ya gonna do?? I've actually had a (fairly) good excuse. Over the weekend my home spent some time as base of operations for some short people, one: my oh so lovely God-daughter, the other , my oh so funny kiwi crack-on partner of yesteryear. In spite of still being unable to walk anywhere in my flat without finding glitter, bits of craft paper and small pieces of arts & crafts heaven stuck to my feet, my God-daughter's visit was awesome. It's the first time she's stayed over for any length of time, and it's amazing how having a six year old around changes your day. You somehow seem to start earlier, finish later, and have a lot less time free in the middle. Life is generally more challenging, but hugely more rewarding. Note to self: Kids are fun.

Having a mate from the old days to stay is also awesome. Don't you just love those friendships where you can be away for months on end, be typically bloke-like in your complete lack of contact in that time, and from the moment you get back together it's like nothing changed?

There is another mate that I should have been spending this weekend with, but for one reason and another couldn't. Back in the deep and distant beginnings, when Stevie (not Steve) was born, The Mighty B and his soon-to-be other half were there, protecting me from the world, and most importantly, myself. They are still there, and they are still doing the same job. Her Ladyship texted me today, as ever, concerned about my problems, just like the two of them always have been. I can't wait until next month, when I get to stand there oh so proudly as two of the very best people on the planet get to tell everyone in public what I've known for many years,

the fact that they love each other totally and completely.
Life Is Good

Oh Well...

Bugger, 3-3, then we manage to lose on a penalty shoot out. Before any northerners out there start thinking about gloating, remember, you do still have to live in the north, so I win in the end...

Come On You Hammers!!!

Today, for the first time in twenty six years, West Ham United will appear in the FA Cup Final!! I've never been what you'd call an architypal brit football fan, but I've followed the Hammers since 1975, and I'll be glued to the box this afternoon cheering the boys in claret and blue. In the spirit of the modern game, I'd like to offer our opposition, Liverpool, all the very best..... Actually, bollocks, I cant wait to see you get your scouse arses kicked all the way back to the grim north....

Apparently..

Some of my friends out there have too much time on their hands, and dont hear enough 'Stevie ranting' at the weekends and want to see my blogging efforts too, so, after a few days trying out this new toy, tomorrow I'm going to 'go public' (ok, that's kind of on it's head, the public can already actually see it if they stumble across it, but my friends havent been made directly aware of it yet, some sort of reverse marketing stratergy or something...) Basically, I'm actually going to send the link to people who've expressed an interest in seeing my blog, as well as a few that I'm arrogant enough to think will be interested in hearing what I have to say.

Uh Oh, I just fell into the first blogging trap, there I am, starting off by loving the freedom of blogging to rant on, regardless of whether or not anyone is listening, when really, I just want some reassurance that SOMEONE is listening, just like everyone else does. Next step is I start to try and find out how many people are listening, closely followed by the 'how can I get more readers' stage and the 'why isnt anyone making any comments' stage. Before long I'll start to get angsty about it, and have to re-evaluate my whole place in life because of the number (or lack therof) of people reading my blog....

So, a number of things happened today, (I'm sure an inordinate amount of things happened today, but not all of them, thankfully, to me) I discovered a piece of music that I think is one of the most beautiful things I have ever heard. It's called "Resta con me", by Ludovico Einaudi. I stumbled across it whilst channel hopping and crashed into it on Classic fmtv, somewhere between MTV and VH1.

Seldom in my life have I come across a piece of music and known upon first hearing that I will love it until the day I die. It really is that good, The Love Of My Life has already downloaded the sheet music and is playing it as I write.

I just spent nearly an hour or so writing today's offering and started to rant on about my dislike of religion and all thing Godly. Then I got to the bottom of it, re-read it, and decided it was mind-numbingly boring. Therefore I will not punish you with it, you did nothing to deserve it, and in my young career as a blogger, I think I've just learnt another of it's greatest assets, just because you can write whatsoever you like, doesn't mean you have to.

T.B.F.T.G.O.G...

I'm about to go bankrupt. This somewhat shocking revelation will come as no great news to many of the people who know me. My attitude to other people's money, particularly that of credit card companies, has never been exactly 'careful'.

Now to many people, perhaps more so those of an older generation, being declared a bankrupt is considered quite a big deal. Indeed, I have to say, I'm finding the whole process quite traumatic. It's upsetting, I have feelings of failure, and yes, it does still carry a level of stigma that I found quite surprising.

However, all this came into perspective today (as these things always do if you hang around long enough). I received two pieces of news, the first was an email update about the current condition of a very good friend of mine who suffered a major stroke over the Christmas period. He has been, in the years I've known him, one of the many wildly out-going hugely talented immensely fun, ever so very cool people I've been fortunate enough to spend much of the last few years with. He lived life to the full, didn't take as much care of himself as he should (though no more or less than most of us) and was hit by this major illness before the age of thirty. He's making good progress, I cant even begin to conceive of how difficult his life must be, but he is alive, and all things considered, looks to be ever so gradually returning to normality.

The second piece of news was about the death of a man whom I had never met. He was the partner of one of my partner's work colleagues. They had only recently, in the last eighteen months, had a child. This child will never know his dad, the child's mother has lost the person that she loves. Again situations that carry a level of trauma I simply cannot comprehend.

Today, my financial situation is still my most prominent thought, I, like everyone else cannot help but focus on my own little bit of the world. Nevertheless, just as everyone should now and again, I have spent some part of today thinking....
"There But For The Grace Of God...."
To everyone concerned, my very best wishes and thoughts are with you.

You're History

The more I think about it, the more everything in my life revolves around history. My love of history, my interest in family history, my place in history. We all wander through life, some of us pausing to think about where we are, or where we're going, but all too often, we don't spend enough time looking at where we've been. We all come from somewhere, obviously... Every one of us that walks around is the end result of someone's story, (one's parents) and the generations that came before one's parents.

I spend a lot of time concerned about this little life, am I doing a good job? What do others think of me? Money, love, fear, hopes etc... but it's scary just how insignificant one is when one looks at the bigger picture.

Sidney Williams, Lilly Young, William Crossfield, Nellie Turner, William Hawes, Elizabeth Standing, William Butler, Mabel Malkin. Eight human beings. Eight lives. Eight stories. Eight histories. All of them are dead, I only ever met one of them, and my memories are vague at best, but without my eight great-grand parents, I simply wouldn't exist.

When you do things in your life, make sure you leave a record of some kind, tell someone, take a picture, write it down, keep a journal. Your own little set backs and achievements may be fairly insignificant in the big picture, but when someone looks back on your life, perhaps long after you're gone, the marks you leave behind will bring you back to life in someone else's mind. You are insignificant, but that doesn't stop you being wonderful, awesome and amazing, you will be history one day, so you might as well make it interesting.

Friends

It's occurred to me in the last few hours that, no matter that I am currently going through one of the most emotionally traumatic periods of my entire life so far, my friends are a shield that protects me from everything the world can throw my way. The greatest investment one can ever make is to take the time to nurture a friendship, you will undoubtedly reap the rewards in the future.

And Back To Reality

Blimey! That was one hell of a week. As anticipated, Amsterdam lived up to it's usual high-octane fun capital of the world reputation. All the usual suspects made the trip, the Designated Driver of course did the honours, once again allowing the rest of us to get right into the Trans-Continental Crack On. All main food groups were consumed under the English Channel as before, and our apartment right on Dam Square put us right at the heart of the action for four days. A big thank you to The Angels for their venue and all their help. In spite of one or two 'chemical overloads' a great time was had by all, a special mention has to go out to Designated Driver and Meatball who announced their intention to go permanent and did the traditional ring swap, feel the love....

Yessshh, Amshhhderdammsshh...

It's here, DamDay, possibly the most exciting day of the year except LotteryWinning Day and I'm sadly yet to see one of those. Everyone is running around in anticipation of the weekends events, Gnomes and I were dancing in our underwear immediately after getting out of bed this morning, a practice I'd recommend for a fun start to the day, though you may wish to keep the curtains closed...enjoy.

As Expected..

As of 3.45pm, The Badger also appeared. Oh well, it is the holidays.

Oh Yes....

In spite of last nights advice from The Love Of My Life The Badger's Aunt has just arrived. I'm hoping The Badger himself has the decency to not appear until at least tomorrow's festivities commence.

Time & Time Again...

Hey, I managed to change the time zone, thus making much of my first and second posts completely nonsensical....ho hum:)

Amsterdam Here We Come

So, here I am, the day before our 4th annual Amsterdam extravaganza! I can truly say I love the city. If you never do anything more decadent with your entire life, at the very least visit her once, walk the red light district and get stoned in a coffee shop.
Amsterdam I have just realized has acquired a certain status in my life, it's actually one of those places that I can genuinely say I have lost count of the number of times I've visited. I can still remember the first time as a 'Dam Virgin', it was the most incredible city I'd ever seen, this bizarre juxtaposition of the seedy alongside the humdrum.
This year we have broken all records, there will be sixteen of us staying in one apartment block right on Damm Square, and, in spite of an earlier disaster when our venue was closed down and the owner arrested just a few weeks ago (so very Amsterdam) we have had an excellent bit of luck, and our group will now be hosting the dance party at the infamous Hells Angels bar, the location of the best Dance party in recent years! This is the big one, favourite party of the year, I feel like a kid before xmas day! My posts may be somewhat limited over the next few days!

Time Gentlemen Please...

Where in the hell is this thing based?? My first comment written by me at the un-Godly hour of 1.10am in the UK, and according to the blog clock, it was posted at 4.55pm?? It's now 1.13am by the way... confused.

Time has always done that to me. I'm nearly forty now, and still my enduring fantasy from childhood days is to be able to travel in time. The reasons for being able to do so have of course changed with different stages of my life, (tending more towards aiding sexual conquest in the teenage years, allowing me to perform amazing feats of grand theft or other dubious means of financial gain as a young man, and finally being able to actually go and meet all those names on the family tree that it's taken me so long to put together, as I reach this age).
Still, the excitement burns in me when the idea of time-travel pops up. You can actually take any old piece of middling tv drama, bung in a 'time-travel' episode and I'd get into it. Start mulling over all the usual rubbish in my head....paradox's, alternate realities...blah blah. I stumbled across a tv show recently on cable, "Timecop" the series, a spin off from the movie. Classic example, possibly one of the most ill-conceived, badly written, appallingly acted pieces of junk to roll off US tv's production line, yet still I was compelled to watch it!......... Ok, like I said, it was just a passing thought....

Hello, Good Evening, And Welcome....

Where does one start?

I guess it was only a matter of time before a man who has a reputation for talking too much got into blogging, so, this is the result.
My main concern when heading down the blogging road was my past experience of attempts to keep a diary. I would set out with the best of intentions, and within a few weeks.......


you get the picture.
Then it dawned on me that there was something different here. This isn't an attempt to gather my thoughts, some sort of record for me to look over down the line, this is a opportunity to just express (sometimes ever so transient) feelings about a particular issue or issues, just as the mood takes me. My blog doesn't care if the Badger is biting hard that day, or if Badger's Aunt had come to visit, (though doubtless there will be occasions when she has and my blog entries will be bizarre in the extreme). My blog doesn't care if what I have to say actually makes any sense, it wont laugh at me if my opinions are totally groundless and based on spurious evidence. It's like having a 'crack-on' audience there for me, on call, 24-7, to talk complete bollocks to as I see fit.
So, with absolutely no fanfare, ceremony or introduction, this is it, my first ever blog!